Metta World Peace has given us a strong leader in the clubhouse for best media quotes. How’d he spend his summer vacation? To SI: “I partied hard in July. You can’t be a boring guy for 12 months on your couch. You gotta party.” What about rapping? “It’s horrible. All my singles failed.” Basketball is a different story, though. See, he had no doubt he’d be back in the Lakers’ lineup this season. He told reporters that he’s “way too good of a basketball player” to get amnestied. He signed a $34 million deal for five seasons in 2009 and is owed $7.2 this season. Is he worth that for defense, opportunistic threes and upper-echelon quotes? Well, he’s certainly not worth amnestying that’s for sure. … High school phenom Jabari Parker narrowed his list of colleges to his top five, which probably caused some coaches to have a bad day if they didn’t cut it (like hometown DePaul). Parker narrowed his choices to Duke, Florida, Michigan State, Stanford and BYU. His dad said he’ll visit Duke at the end of the month but he’ll take all five visits. The pride of Derrick Rose‘s alma mater, Simeon, is a 6-8 matchup nightmare for high schoolers and is also a devout Mormon, hence the BYU listing in his final five. Is the world ready for Jabari-mania to take over Provo after Jimmer‘s run? … The Minnesota Timberwolves had a secret weapon in luring Brandon Roy out of early retirement this summer, and his name is Will Conroy. Cagey GM David Kahn had known Conroy, who went to high school with Roy and played point for Washington, since the two were in Albuquerque in the NBDL. Conroy also knew Rick Adelman from a brief stint in Houston when Adelman was putting in a fast-break offense with the Rockets. Conroy isn’t some player-turned-insider on the Minny staff, though. He’s still trying to make it in the NBA past the 10-day contracts he’s had with a few teams. He told the AP that he jokes with Kahn how he needs to give him a job. If the Roy experiment works out, Conroy should get some kind of kickback. … We’re out like the infield fly rule.
Follow Dime Magazine on Twitter
Become a fan of Dime Magazine on Facebook