Wait, which one is “Before”?
You can already buy 11 hours worth of Lord of the Rings, not including making-ofs or special features. But Peter Jackson and Guillermo Del Toro still have a whole other book to film, and you better believe they’re gonna milk those hairy homoerotic midgets for all they’re worth. Two more movies worth, to be exact. Said director Del Toro to Empire magazine…
“We’ve decided to have The Hobbit span the two movies, including the White Council and the comings and goings of Gandalf to Dol Guldur.”
The White Council AND the coming and goings of Gandalf to Dol Guldur? In two movies??!! That’s worth at least a 10-part miniseries! This is a travesty! Adds producer Jackson:
“We decided it would be a mistake to try to cram everything into one movie. The essential brief was to do The Hobbit, and it allows us to make The Hobbit in a little more style, if you like, of the trilogy.”
Well I just hope they’ll add a few weeks worth of extra footage for the DVD. The great thing about Lord of the Rings is that the bad guys are evil and the good guys are good, but they’re always fighting! And it’s all like, whoa, who’s gonna win! I mean, I could watch that forever. Yay, here comes another epilogue!