By: 03.12.10  •  42 Comments

Opening this weekend:

Green Zone
Despite this looking exactly like one of those boring-ass Bourne movies, it’s been getting pretty good reviews, and actually sounds kind of interesting.  I’d say that’s a good thing, but I guarantee if it does well, studio execs are just going to interpret its success as “See? Audiences love shakey cam, ROFLJO!”

She’s Out of My League
I’m not the best spokesperson for the feminist point of view because I think all women should stay in the kitchen baking me pies and rubbing oil on their tits, but seriously, if you’re a boring douche like Jay Baruchel, you get to date a boring, mediocre-looking chick.  In all honesty, I can’t think of a concept more tired than this one, and there are a lot of tired concepts out there.  As many as there are tired puppies, at least.

Remember Me
This looked like a lame (and hackneyed) glorification of rich, whiny NYU asswipes even before I heard about the Secret Dwarf Hooker ending (don’t click that unless you want a spoiler).  The only reason I’d consider seeing this is to sit in the back, and every time Emilie De Ravin came on screen, shout, “CHAAAHLIE MOY BAAAAIBY NOOOOOOOAAAAAARR!”

And yes, that’s 100% phonetically accurate.  Trust me, I know what an Australian girl shouting “No” sounds like.

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