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Checking in with the Avatards

By / 04.26.10

Avatar was released on Earth Day last week and has already sold 2.7 million Blu-rays and 4 million DVDs , making it, according to Fox, the fastest-selling Blu-Ray of all time.  And this despite, in the absence of 3D televisions, the two-dimensional Avatar being a bit of a “game-samer.”  Anyway, I thought this would be a good time to check in with our friends over at the Avatard forums for some classic found comedy.  Here’s the best of what I found:

“I look around at the garbage-strewn, high-tech squalor here and see in the murky distance that much better place – pristine Pandora, opalescent in the velvet darkness.”

Avatard Emo Poetry.  Thank you, Jeebus.

“After getting harmonic with the nature every day I stay 2 to 3 hours in my garden, with my dogs and seeing what’s beautiful in it.”

“I talked so much about AVATAR at school that when i’m gonna say something they run hahaha”

Haha, I love you, pathos.

“me and my buddy were playing paintball together on the same team and while a player on the other team was running up a butterfly landed on my shoulder.  i poke my buddy and tell him to look and i say
‘a sign from eywa!’ i got shot in the face a second after.”

“The best incident for me, though, was working alone in the carriage shed at the preserved railway. I’m always forgetting where I put my tools! Anyway I had lost my pencil. I began to get more and more angry until I found myself saying “Mawey nve’ar. Mawey! It just came out. I then stood still for a moment, realising what I had just said. Thankfully no one was around. I realised then that the film and story had penetrated my soul more than I knew. I still don’t know what to make of it.
Eywa ngahu,
Alan”

“People are weird! Maybe one of the reasons I enjoy the company of a hamster more than people.”

It’s not so weird, hamsters can reach places people can’t.  Plus, they’re furry.

“It just astounds me to know that people are afraid to admit that they thought the most successful film of all time was incredible. Thanks for the giggles, humanity!”

“The people at my high school are ignorant and dumb and oblivious to the message of the movie. All they care about is degrading others and trying to look cool. They just say it is a rip off of other movies and the usual sky people bs.”

“Q: What do you dislike about our planet which is not a problem on Pandora?
Answer : Mankind and it’s ways .
Solution ? Unknown .”

Aw, now I has a sad.

Can’t agree with you more.
I feel like an outcast in my society.
It seems I’m the only one that cares! :(

Ah yes, nothing like a well-timed frownie emoticon to turn others’ sadness into my pleasure.  What can I say, I’m just a mentally-sick primate.  I say we fire up the FilmDrunk van, head on down to the Avatard picnic and chant “SKY PEOPLE! SKY PEOPLE! SKY PEOPLE!” while pantsing everyone there.


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