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Mickey Rourke as a dog-loving Genghis Khan? Yes, please.

By / 04.23.10

Nothing about this picture fits.

This story has all the right moves.  Picture: Mickey Rourke as Genghis Khan, in a film from the director of Conan the Barbarian and Red Dawn (John Milius).  I’m so excited I could punch a camel in the face.  From TheWrap:

“I’m playing Genghis,” revealed Rourke. “John wrote [the] piece [as] told from the son and grandson’s point of view, how they saw this mythic figure from their family. You see him in flashbacks, back when he was in his mid-40s. And back then, being in your mid-40s was being REALLY old.”

Other Mickey Rourke gems:

  • “I probably ride a horse better than I drive a car,”
  • “The Mongols used dogs in battle, and dogs rarely made it out of the battle. But in one instance, in this script, [Khan] orders his men – ‘Hold the dogs back.’ He was looking out for the dogs. I like that.”

And I like you, Mickey.  Sadly, John Milius hasn’t made a movie since 1991, so I doubt anything will happen with this.  Which is a shame.  Mickey Rourke was born to play a Mongol.  I mean, tell me this doesn’t sound like a description of Mickey Rourke:

The Mongols, from the dry grasslands of the north, had never formed the habit of bathing.  “They smell so heavily that one cannot approach them,” a Chinese traveler to Mongolia reported.  “They wash themselves in urine.” [Source]

So they…

  • Drink horse milk
  • Bathe in pee
  • Love dogs

Sounds like Mickey Rourke alright.  I’d love to see a modern Mongol horde made up of Mickey Rourke, Rip Torn, and Nick Nolte.  They could ride in and take over a bank, then spend the rest of their time eating beef jerky and doing target practice on empty beer cans.


I want more like this!

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