Opening Everywhere: Movie 43, Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters, Parker. God help us, it’s January. God help us all.
FilmDrunk Suggests: I suggest that you sit down and buckle up, because someone cut the brake lines on the negative train and I’m about to crash this sucker into Cynic City, USA.
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 10% critics, 71% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
“A gaping wound on the side of cinema, a January release that’s yearning to be hidden from audiences, the ugly stinking maw of a Hollywood system that thinks you’re an idiot.” – Our great friend Laremy Legel, Film.com
“Well, they didn’t name it after the number of big laughs in it.” – Roger Moore, Movie Nation
Armchair Analysis: It’s hard to describe Movie 43. It’s basically a sketch film, with one of the most ridiculously amazing ensemble casts that you’ll ever see. Movie 43 is like the comedy version of Valentine’s Day, except with twice as many stars. That’s why it took 4 years to make this movie, because Peter Farrelly and the 10 other directors involved had to catch stars like Kate Winslet, Hugh Jackman, Naomi Watts, Richard Gere, Halle Berry, Emma Stone, Dennis Quaid, Seth MacFarlane and so many more in between their projects.
Hell, they even got ESPN’s Michael Wilbon to play a “Human Buttplug”. That is some serious superstar casting.
When I first saw that this movie was being made, my mind drifted off to a much better time in Hollywood, when sketch movies and spoof comedies were actually hilarious. I thought of one of the funniest movies that I’ve ever seen, The Kentucky Fried Movie, and then I wondered, “Is it possible? Did Peter Farrelly manage to recapture the magic that has been depleted by vapid human wastelands like Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg?”
No. Not unless the marketing team chose to include MacFarlane’s incredibly tired Schindler’s List joke and Terrence Howard’s “This isn’t hockey!” speech in the trailer to make us think, “They’re just using the sh*tty jokes so they don’t ruin the good jokes.” I want so badly to be wrong, but this movie looks like it will be terrible.