As Vince pointed out only yesterday, this latest flick from director/star Ben Affleck has been raking in the awards, and now just in time for the Oscars this Sunday, we can all catch up with this film on DVD. Of course, this movie has already won one of cinema’s greatest awards: inclusion (at 6th place) in FilmDrunk’s best film’s of 2012. In other words, Vince liked it, giving it a ‘B+’ in his review. Of course the big controversy is that Affleck was ‘snubbed’ by not being nominated for the Best Director Oscar. After all, by my unofficial count, he’s won like a million directing awards for Argo, including the BAFTA, the Golden Globe, and the Director’s Guild of America award. Ultimately though, that’s neither here nor there because the flick is up for Best Picture, and many prognosticators are giving it the edge over the former sure-thing, Lincoln. Fun fact: If Argo does win Best Picture, as producer, George Clooney gets to come up on stage and accept the award (along with the other producers, Affleck and Grant Heslov). Bet you didn’t even realize Clooney was nominated this year, did you? Just so, if Django Unchained wins Best Picture, the dude who directed House Party and The Ladies Man becomes an Oscar winner. Weird, right?
From the same people who gave us Atonement and Pride & Prejudice, Anna Karenina is another Oscar-bait period piece adapted from a book I’ll never read. The bait worked too, if you ignore the fact that Anna Karenina’s four Oscar nominations are all in boring categories: Cinematography, Costume Design, Score, and Production Design. As long as we’re on the subject of movie’s I’ll never watch that are hitting DVD this week, here are a few more: North Sea Texas – gay Belgian teens discover their sexuality while, evidently, failing geography. An American Girl: McKenna Shoots For The Stars – this stars Ian Ziering and Nia Vardalos as McKenna’s parents. That’s all that needs to be said, right? Your American Teen – this documentary sheds light on the teen sex slave industry, and specifically its exploitation of American girls. Because those slutty teen whores from every other country on the planet are just getting what’s coming to them, I guess.
Ethan Hawke plays Ellison Oswalt, a true crime writer who moves his family into a creepy house in which an horrific crime previously took place. He hopes to write a book about the crime and finds old film strips that…blah blah blah. It doesn’t really matter does it? The poster, the title, and even the description sounds like literally dozens of other horror movies. All that really matters is whether this one is any good or not. Well, the critics liked it better than most horror flicks (which doesn’t mean they liked it –just that they liked it more than the others) and Ethan Hawke -while not exactly an A-list actor or a guy with a stellar track record- at least has a bit of a reputation for choosing his roles carefully, so maybe this is worth a shot? I have to admit, the red-band trailer (which I’ve shared below) has me intrigued. It’s probably because it looks familiar to me; after we moved into our house, I was digging around and also found old footage of people getting strung up and lynched on a tree branch. Not to worry though, my house isn’t haunted; it just turns out that the previous owner used to be head of the A/V department for his local white supremacy chapter. Yes, my grandpa is a man of many interests. Gave us a good deal on the house too, even if he does insist that we ‘jewed the price down’, whatever that means. I can’t follow all of his folksy, old-timey slang.
Nickelodeon ‘presents’ this film directed by one of the co-creators of Gossip Girl, and it features Chelsea Handler in a catholic school girl costume in the trailer. I’d say that this film clearly isn’t for me, but as its worldwide box-office haul is still $4 million shy of its reasonably modest $14 million budget, I guess it would be more accurate to say that it really isn’t for anyone, which is kind of surprising given that a car gets humped by a giant chicken in the trailer.