On Monday, Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis was found guilty of three misdemeanor counts of false imprisonment, one misdemeanor count of assault and one misdemeanor count of dissuading a witness, all related to a 2011 incident with three women that he met at a night club. With his sentencing set for July 9, the 40-year old faces a maximum of five years in prison, according to prosecutors, but it’s more likely that he won’t get any time. Either way, he doesn’t seem too concerned, because he’s heading to India for a vacation.
But before he left, Francis actually agreed to an exclusive interview with the Hollywood Reporter to discuss, among other things, the claims by the three women that he forcefully kept them in his home and assaulted one when they protested to him trying to separate them. While the entire interview is worth the read, he managed to get his thoughts on the jury that convicted him on video, and I honestly don’t know if this is real of a Funny or Die clip.
Wow. Okay. What else?
“The problem with the jury system is that anyone who’s not smart enough to come with an excuse to get out of jury duty doesn’t get out,” he continues. “Only the stupidest of the stupidest people end up on juries, you know? I’ve never met a smart person who’s done jury duty.”
Fair enough. What about your other critics?
“You know why I’ve been criticized, why I’ve been brutalized?” he says. “Anybody who criticizes me, anybody who — it’s just a jealous guy. Everybody who says, ‘Oh, Joe Francis is this’ — look at their penis and tell me if it’s small. Tell me!”
And how about the size of his own, um, manhood? He laughs gleefully. “It’s been widely reported my penis is huge, but look, I have nothing to prove” — upon which he tries to do just that, tussling with his rather sweet girlfriend and urging her to tell me about his assets. She wriggles away, mortified.
“Tell him!” he laughs.
“No way!” she yells, vanishing into the kitchen.
The rest is pretty spectacular, as he holds nothing back regarding how great of a person he is, according to himself.