John Malkovich Saved A Man’s Life In Toronto

If you thought that Canada had the world’s best health system before this weekend, it apparently just got a lot better. Now famous Hollywood celebrities will show up to save your life if you get hurt while you’re out walking around. At least that’s what happened to a 77-year old Ohio man after he cut his neck on a piece of scaffolding in Toronto over the weekend.

Jim Walpole and his wife were enjoying a leisurely stroll through the City Within a Park, when he tripped on a curb and slashed his throat on some scaffolding. His wife, a nurse, feared for his life so she screamed out for help, and of all the people on the planet to have been right there, smoking a cigarette and watching it all go down, John Malkovich came to the rescue.

Chris Mathias, a doorman from the King Edward Hotel, also sprinted to help the man when he fell on Thursday night. He said he found Walpole lying on his back in a pool of blood.

“I believe (Malkovich) was having a cigarette and witnessed the whole thing happening, he placed his hand and started applying pressure to the man’s neck didn’t let go until the ambulance arrived,” Mathias said.

Ben Quinn, the owner of P.J. O’Brien’s where the Walpoles had just had dinner, was also driving by when he got out of his car and stopped to help.

“I was bleeding so bad on my neck and Chris bought him a towel and John kept pressure on my bleeding neck and then Quinn kept me from turning over and made me stay there until EMS arrived,” Walpole said. (Via the Toronto Star)

Walpole only needed 10 stitches, but the doctor told him that if the cut had been another eighth of an inch over, he probably would have died.

The most Malkovich-ian part of this story is that Walpole asked Malkovich his name and he just told him John, and then when the ambulance took him to the hospital, that was the last he ever saw of him. It’s like Malkovich slowly stepped backward into the shadows, inhaled another drag of his cigarette and waited for the next man to trip over the curb.

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