Your Mid-Week Guide To DVD And Streaming: '6 Souls' Leads A Really Slow Week

Once again, my dear friend Morton Salt is away from his desk with more pressing matters – his car is rolling down a hill and he’s running after it in just a bath towel – so I’m here to let you know what’s new at the old Red Box and NetFlix this week. It’s a… light week. In fact, it’s so light that I really haven’t heard of any of these movies. But I’m also an eccentric shut-in, living in fear of the government, so I’ve just been watching old VHS tapes of MTV’s Alternative Nation for the past 10 years, waiting for the aliens to rescue me.

That said, hitting shelves this week are:

6 Souls

Venus and Serena

Inescapable

Tai Chi Hero

The House I Live In

Least Among Saints

Blood Runs Cold

Wiener Dog Nationals

Tower Block

Best of Warner Bros. 20 Film Collection Comedy

So why don’t we slip into something more comfortable and decide what we should watch tonight? Here, have some more Zima.

6 Souls

After the death of her husband, Dr. Cara Harding’s (Julianne Moore) faith in God has been shaken, but not her belief in science. In an attempt to open her up to accepting unexplainable psychiatric theories, her father introduces her to Adam, a patient with multiple personalities who takes on some of the physical characteristics of his other personalities. Cara quickly discovers that Adam’s other personalities are murder victims and the more she finds out about him and his past, the closer she and her loved ones are to becoming murder victims themselves.

Should You Watch It? I had no clue this was ever even made. That can’t be a good sign. Then again, someone just told me that I “have to watch” something called Citizen Kane, so I guess anything is worthy of a shot.

Venus and Serena

Venus and Serena takes an unfiltered look into the remarkable lives of the greatest sister-act professional tennis has ever seen. In a sport where they were not welcomed, the indomitable Williams sisters faced the opposition with grace and courage not only breaking new ground for female and African American athletes everywhere, but dominating the women’s game for over a decade. The film tells the inspiring story of how these two women, against all odds, but with the help of visionary parents, made it to the top. Venus and Serena also explores the struggle of these two aging superstars during the 2011 tennis season as they battle life and career-threatening health problems. In Venus and Serena we gain unprecedented access into the sisters’ lives – both in the spotlight and behind closed doors – and we watch as they draw their greatest strengths from one another to overcome countless adversities.

Should You Watch It? It’s not like you can watch them play at Wimbledon right now. BURNNNNNNN.

Inescapable

This politically charged and emotionally powerful thriller follows a successful businessman who suddenly finds his life turned upside down when his journalist daughter goes missing during her trip to his hometown of Damascus. He knows that the reason for his exile is tied to his daughter’s disappearance. His first trip home in over 30 years turns into a frantic quest to rescue his daughter while reconnecting with the love of his life.

Should You Watch It? On one hand, Marisa Tomei should be celebrated any chance we get. On the other hand, this sucker has lower Rotten Tomatoes scores than most Wayans Brothers movies.

Tai Chi Hero

Lu Chan (Jayden Yuan) is still trying to find his place in Chen Village, the legendary town where everyone is a martial arts master…and Chen-style Tai Chi is forbidden to outsiders. But since he helped save the town from a frightening steam-powered machine, Yuniang (Angelababy), beautiful daughter of Grandmaster Chen (Tony Leung Ka-Fai), agrees to marry Lu Chan and bring him into the family. It’s only a formality, though – she is the teacher, and he is the student – and that suits Lu Chan just fine, as the mutant horn on his head gives him incredible kung-fu power, but leaves him dumber each time, and closer to death.

Should You Watch It? I’m not trying to be a jerk, but Tai Chi Hero < “Jukebox Hero”. I ain’t apologizing for being an American, okay?

The House I Live In

Why We Fight director Eugene Jarecki shifts his focus from the military industrial complex to the War on Drugs in this documentary exploring the risks that prohibition poses to freedom, and the tragedy of addicts being treated as criminals. In the four decades since the War on Drugs commenced, over 45 millions of addicts have been arrested – and for each one jailed, another family is destroyed. Meanwhile, the prisons in America are growing overcrowded with non-violent criminals, and illegal drugs are still being sold in schoolyards. By examining just where it all went wrong, Jarecki reveals that a solution is possible if we can just find it in ourselves to be compassionate, and see past the decades of paranoia and propaganda.

Should You Watch It? Yes, because we’re all going to have to get used to life in prison one of these days. If it’s not by Comrade Obama’s decree, then it will certainly be at Lord Xenu’s command.

Least Among Saints

Returning home to a broken marriage and an uncertain future, combat veteran Anthony Hayward (Papazian) believes there is no hope for himself. Yet when a troubled ten year-old neighbor, Wade (Tristan Lake Leabu), calls out for help, Anthony cannot turn away. To the dismay of the boy’s social worker (Laura San Giacomo), Anthony sets out on a fool’s quest to help this heartbroken and hard-to-reach child find his long-lost father. In the midst of this new mission – the first that seems to matter since his return – Anthony begins to come to grips with both the costs of war and the universal power of human connection.

Should You Watch It? Yes, because the doggy is cute.

Wiener Dog Nationals

A boy and his family adopt a runt of a dachshund from the local shelter and name her Shelly in honor of shelter dogs everywhere. Despite all odds, Shelly surprises the boy’s father (Jason London, Jason and the Argonauts, Dazed and Confused) when she places in the state trials of Wienerschnitzel’s illustrious Wiener Dog Nationals race. The family pools all of its resources to advance to the next round only to face strong opposition from the reigning champion, Princess, and her owner Ms. Merryweather (Morgan Fairchild, Fashion House, Flamingo Road). Meanwhile, judge Melanie (Alicia Witt, 88 Minutes, Two Weeks Notice) is banned from the race by the head judge (Bryan Batt, Funny People, AMC’s Mad Men) when she tries to help the family prove that Ms. Merryweather is cheating. Relying only on her skill and her young owner’s passion, little Shelly and her new family must face the challenge of advancing through the cutthroat world of the nation’s greatest wiener dog race. One race. One nation. One wiener!

Should You Watch It? Sure, if only to answer the question: “Hey, whatever happened to Alicia Witt?”

Tower Block

When Jimmy is brutally murdered by two hooded figures, Becky, Kurtis, Neville and the other residents of the Serenity House tower block are witnesses to the killing but, fearing retribution, are too scared to give detectives any information and the police investigation is going nowhere. One year later, someone has decided to take justice into their own hands. Picked off one by one, the tenants of Serenity House are under threat from a mystery sniper who has set deadly traps throughout the building. Unsure of why they have been targeted, the group undertake daring attempts to escape the building.

Should You Watch It? It sounds like Saw meets every action movie that has been released in the past few years about fighting in a building. I’ll just watch Dredd again, because Karl Urban and I should be best friends.

Best of Warner Bros. 20 Film Collection Comedy

A Night At The Opera (1935), Stage Door (1937), Bringing Up Baby (1938), The Philadelphia Story (1940), Arsenic and Old Lade (1944), The Long Long Trailer (1954), The Great Race (1965), Blazing Saddles (1974), The In-Laws (1979), Caddyshack (1980), National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983), Risky Business (1983), The Goonies (1985), Spies Like Us (1985) Beetlejuice (1988), Grumpy Old Men (1993), Ace Ventura Pet Detective (1994), Analyze This (1999), Wedding Crashers: Uncorked Edition (2005) and The Hangover (2009)

Should You Watch It? Yes. I’m so glad they included Spies Like Us in this set, because it is such a phenomenally underrated comedy. And that says a lot, because despite the best efforts of Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd to destroy their legacies, it still holds up so well all these years later. Even the part where Vanessa Angel would ever, ever agree to sleep with Aykroyd.

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