As it relates to movies, “based on a videogame” is right up there with “biopic of British royalty” on my all-time No Thanks list. Videogames tend to be amalgamations of movie plots, so when you base a movie on a videogame, you’re all but guaranteeing that it’s going to be generic. It’s like taking a picture of a photocopy. Nonetheless, if you like Fast and Furious and Breaking Bad‘s Aaron Paul, Dreamworks is hoping you’ll love watching Jesse Pinkman kill bad guys with vroom cars in Need for Speed, opening in March. Me, I’m just not sure Aaron Paul has the acting chops to pull off the Paul Walker role. GRRR, CLOSE-UP OF HAND SHIFTING!
Opening in theaters on March 14, 2014, Need for Speed captures the thrills of the video game franchise in a real-world setting. The story chronicles a near-impossible cross-country race against time—one that begins as a mission for revenge, but proves to be one of redemption. In a last attempt to save his struggling garage, blue-collar mechanic Tobey Marshall (Paul)—who with his team skillfully builds and races muscle cars on the side—reluctantly partners with wealthy, arrogant ex-NASCAR driver Dino Brewster (Dominic Cooper). Just as a major sale to car broker Julia Bonet (Imogen Poots) looks like it will save the business, a disastrous, unsanctioned race results in Dino framing Tobey for manslaughter.
Two years later and fresh out of prison, Tobey is set on revenge with plans to take down Dino in the high-stakes De Leon race—the Super Bowl of underground racing. To get there in time, Tobey must run a high-octane, action-packed gauntlet, dodging cops coast-to-coast and dealing with fallout from a dangerous bounty Dino put on his car. With his loyal crew and the surprisingly resourceful Julia as allies, Tobey defies odds at every turn and proves that even in the flashy world of exotic supercars, the underdog can still finish first. [ComingSoon]
DERP FACTORY OWNER: The derps! They’ve stolen all of my beautiful derps!
Hard-boiled, overwrought voice over set to dramatic music? Hey, it worked for Max Payne, right? I rate this three armpit farts and a wanking motion.
I want more like this!
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