So That Accidental Sex Scene A Florida Theater Saw Instead Of Frozen? It Was Probably Dallas Buyers Club.

A few days ago, Burnsy brought you the delightful story of an audience at a theater in Florida who sat down for a screening of Frozen, and, instead of a nice Disney film about snowmen, were treated to a “sexually-explicit film clip” (in the words of FoxTampaBay).

At the time, it was unclear what the explicit clip actually was. A later story based on an anonymous tip to a UK site called Mosh claimed the clip was the extended red-band trailer for Nymphomaniac, which was widely reported as fact. That would’ve been pretty awesome if it was true, considering the Nymphomaniac trailer features blowjobs, vagina close-ups, and semen dripping down a leg (perfect family entertainment!). But the story didn’t jibe for a number of reasons.

This being an incredibly important story, our Florida correspondent Ashley Burns reached out to the Regal Cinemas Park Place Stadium 16 in Pinellas Park, where a young lady gave him a respectful “no comment.” But based on the way the incident was described in a statement from Regal, I think we can reasonably infer that the clip was from Dallas Buyers Club:

“In an isolated incident, an erroneously programmed ‘R-rated’ feature did start Friday evening in one auditorium at Park Place,” Regal VIP of marketing and communications Russ Nunley said in a statement. “Less than two minutes of this incorrect movie was shown before it was stopped.”

The film that was incorrectly played could’ve been a scene from Matthew McConaughey drama Dallas Buyers Club, the The Tampa Bay Times reported. Nunley did not deny the report. [THR]

As we pointed out in previous stories, Dallas Buyers Club, which opens with Matthew McConaughey having sex with a woman in a rodeo stall, was playing at the Regal Cinemas, and that makes a lot more sense than them having a random copy of the web-only Nymphomaniac trailer sitting around. It also jibes with the original witness’s description of the clip as “R-Rated.”

It just goes to show, you can’t trust these hysterical mothers. “Appalling?” How dare you. Matthew McConaughey having rodeo sex with a lady is the most natural, beautiful thing in the world, and every child should be so lucky to experience it at an impressionable age. Every kid in that audience will probably grow up to be a sexual ty-rannosaurus and they’ll have Matthew McConaughey to thank. Matthew McConaughey and fate.

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