Are you aware WalMart has been producing movies? They are amazing.

By: 06.15.11  •  20 Comments

I’ll try to forgive you if you missed it, but this past Saturday marked an important milestone: the premiere of the sixth movie of the “Family Movie Night” series, created as part of a venture between WalMart and Proctor and Gamble to produce cheeseball family films promoting their products.  You can see the trailer for Field of Vision above, starring Faith Ford and Joey Adler. It’s about bullying!  Message!  Walmart and P & G have been releasing a new one of these every month, and they. Are. Amazing. The world’s greatest satirist could not dream up a more perfect send up of Hollywood storytelling than these earnest, unintentional parodies. They all look like they were produced by Roger Corman’s fundamentalist Christian/closeted gay brother, with stock premises boiled down to only their most essential ingredients.  They’re like cinematic astronaut food.

And of course they’re all a glorious mad lib of prominent conservatives and washed-up B-listers:

Their fifth co-funded movie, Truth Be Told, debuted on Saturday night on Fox, starring Candace Cameron Bure [yes, Kirk’s sister -Ed] and David James Elliott, among others, and including a musical performance by Danny Gokey of American Idol fame and a cameo by NFL star Kurt Warner. [BrandChannel]

Danny Gokey AND Kurt Warner???  This must have cost them a mint!  I’ve got more trailers after the jump, and I just know you’ll love them as much as I do.  Oh the glorious, delicious earnestness. It nourishes me.

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