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Brace yourself for an onslaught of penis-related headlines, because if there’s any truth to the rumors that Ben Affleck was selling to MTV, we’re going to see a little more of him in Gone Girl than we’re used to. In a new interview for his upcoming thriller, based on the New York Times Best Seller by Gillian Flynn, Affleck claims that when director David Fincher was preparing him for his role as the husband of a missing woman (the always angelic Rosamund Pike), he told him that the movie “can have no vanity” and that “you have to see the naked underbelly of this character.” Translation: There might be some full frontal footage of Affleck, in case that’s the kind of thing that butters your popcorn.
Of course, there’s also the chance that Affleck is exaggerating the length of time that he’ll be naked on the big screen, if he even is at all. In that case, he’d be nothing but a big, old girthy liar. For the record, Vulture’s Amanda Dobbins said that she does not recall seeing Affleck’s ding-dong at all in Gone Girl, but sometimes you miss things if you’re not sitting in the first row.
Vince’s Note: I received tangential confirmation of the Batpenis from a colleague and responded accordingly:
Still waiting for a response.
UPDATE 2: Another colleague tells me that you do get to see Affleck’s penis for “5-6 seconds.” More news on this story as it comes.
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Who is the set of tits to his right?
All you need to know is “carrie coon nude the leftovers”
I saw the movie last night. I, honestly, don’t think I saw anything. For a second I remember bracing myself given the camera angle, but all I was presented with was Grade A Bawstin Red Sawx ass.
So Ben has a bit part?
Lmao
As long as my penis doesn’t make an appearance at Gone Girl, parole violations and all.
sadface.jpg
Hope the few seconds of Matt Damon’s cameo is worth the hype.
I don’t think Vince’s tweet asking for details is weird at all.
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all pertinent, legitimate inquiries and I’m grateful there’s someone out there working for truth on our behalf. my only question: what is the generally accepted metric for vascularity? I’m trying to imagine a measurement technique but are we only talking back vein? or is this all just like a ‘rate 1-5 1 being one of those snooty stir straws that are not actually functioning straws at all / 5 being arterial X-Hose’ kind of thing?
Already on Buzzfeed, but they used the always classy “peen.”
So many people will watch this movie, looking for this one scene. You might even say they’re…
(dons sunglasses)
Good Willie Hunting
YEEAAHHHHHHH
(alright, I know Damon played Will Hunting, not Affleck. Gimme a break, I don’t get paid for this like Ashley or Vince)
Ready your arrows boys
Rosamund Pike doesnt do it for me
It’s 2014, no shame in being gay, bro.
All I got from this article is, “…Affleck is exaggerating the length…”