Comments of the Week

Senior Editor
07.12.10 59 Comments

This week I’ve got a couple signed Olivia Munn posters to give away to promote her new book, Suck It, Wonder Woman: The Misadventures of a Hollywood Geek.  (I’m also giving away the book, but I have to read it first so I can write a review).  As always, nominate for next week’s Comments of the Week by copy and pasting in the comments section below.

Now for the best.  First, Pauly Dangerously in the Willy Wonka Alternate Ending thread, for getting this song stuck in my head:

Påüłÿ Ðąηgęrσűşľγ says:
Come with meeeee….
And you’ll beeee….
In a wooorld of strangle masturbation.

Next, Chino Moreno’s series from Twilight Shoes Even Gayer Than Expected:

ChinoMoreno says: These shoes, like the wearers of them, do not come in a box.

ChinoMoreno says:
 These shoes are so abstinent, there’s not even any tongue!!

ChinoMoreno says: 
I love my undead, gay shoes!!!

I love a good Heathers reference.  And finally, from Does WB Want Chris Columbus for Superman?

ATidyLittleSum says: “This idea is the greatest idea I’ve ever heard”, said Bizzaro.

Simple, yet effective.  So send me your addresses, Pauly, Chino, and Tidy. And now, the honorable mentions.

From Colin Farrell to Play Ozzy in Biopic?

Stinky Peet says:
 I think Cameron Diaz should have a cameo as a live bat.

The Mighty Feklahr says: The Mighty Feklahr feels that Shia Labeouf should play Tony Iommi. [This is one of those instances where the shtick pretty much makes the comment. -Ed.]

From Gay Twilight Shoes:

H.I. McDunnough says: Do they come in steel toe? Otherwise I can’t wear them at work :(

From The Vampires Suck Trailer is Pretty Terrible:

Jirish says: I’d rather watch Twilight. [A simple yet perfect encapsulation of why Seltzer Freebird are so terrible]

From A live-action Little Mermaid movie?

Donkey Hodey says: I just don’t see why the prince wouldn’t have married her. Do you know how f*cking rare it is to find a woman who would trade her tongue in for a vagina and a pair of legs that make leaving the kitchen excruciating?

From The Facebook Movie trailer will rape you with its word boner:

Bubb Rubb says:

The Internet’s not written in pencil, Mark. It’s written in INK.

FIRST!!!

da InrnEtz No RiDDenz in PenSels, LOL :^i) Is ridteN in ENKS!!!1! lmaorofls! Your mom, bich!

FIXED!

From Rejected titles for Saw VII:

openwideforchunky says: Saw VII: Audience 0

Nice.  And finally, I really enjoyed this little exchange from The Mel Gibson audio tape:

Token Black Guy says: What an asshole. We don’t roll around in packs. We call it a Murder, like the crows.

Morton Salt says: That may be true, but once the rest of us start saying it that way you’ll just change it anyways.

Anyway, nicely done, folks.  As always, there were way too many good ones for me to recognize them all. It’s like I always say, settle down, ladies, I only have one penis.

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