Before I saw Shame, I used to call Michael Fassbender “Michael F. Assbender.” But now that I know the kind of meat he’s packing, I think “Michael & The Fasspenis” might be more accurate – like an indie band, or a Russian opera. Anyway, Toldja.com is reporting that M & The FP have signed on for The Counselor, the original screenplay by Cormac McCarthy. It was rumored earlier that Ridley Scott would make The Counselor his next movie after Prometheus, which opens in June, but one should always take Ridley Scott rumors with a grain of salt, because Ridley Scott has even more talk and less follow through than your average coked-up Hollywood type. Well now, according to Deadline, The Counselor has “landed” Michael Fassbender and is “eyeing” a May 1st start date. I use sarcastiquotes because who the hell knows what those words even mean in this context.
Scott has landed one of the hottest actors in Hollywood, is eyeing a May 1 start date, and talking to a number of high-profile actors to take part in a film that insiders are describing as “No Country For Old Men on steroids.”
The protagonist is a respected lawyer who thinks he can dip a toe in to the drug business without getting sucked down. It is a bad decision and he tries his best to survive it and get out of a desperate situation.
Now, Scott has to get his bad guy. Last time there was a villain like this conjured up by McCarthy, Javier Bardem played him and won an Oscar in No Country For Old Men. I’m hearing names like Jeremy Renner, Bradley Cooper and even some unexpected candidates like Brad Pitt, whose career launched in Scott’s Thelma & Louise.
The film isn’t set at a studio and it is unclear when it will be. [yes, it seems like this part is pretty important] -via Deadline/Toldja.com
I love Cormac McCarthy’s work, but I don’t know how excited to be about this until Prometheus comes out and we get to see whether it’s good enough to wash the taste of the colossal clusterf*ck that was Robin Hood out of our mouths (what does colossal clusterf*ck taste like? You don’t want to know, bros.). Was it an unfortunate misfire or a symptom of Ridley Scott’s gradual descent into madness? Hard to say, though he has seemed a bit megalomaniacal lately. All I know is that with Michael Fassbender involved, “No Country for Old Men on steroids” doesn’t sound like a great description. How about “No Country for Old Men on penis-enlargement pills.” Look at him, he looks like the “after” scene from an Enzyte commercial:
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Banner pic via Copyranter