The other day, FilmDrunkard David was kind enough to send me the above screencap from the RottenTomatoes reviews page for Shrek Forever After, showing that it had received only one positive review. And guess who it is, surprise, surprise, our old friend Pete Hammond. Here’s what Pete says about the film, broken into out-of-context quotes and with exclamation points added, the way he would want it:
- “Hilarious and heartfelt from start to finish!”
- “The best Shrek of them all!”
- “Big laughs and emotion!”
- “You can’t beat these beloved Ogres in brilliant 3D (for the first time) for pure entertainment this summer!”
- “Shrek is without question the funniest film of the year-at least so far!”
Some of the previous films Pete Hammond deemed “funniest” of their respective genres include:
- Heartbreak Kid (“Ben Stiller’s funniest film.”)
- Vicky Cristina Barcelona (“Woody Allen’s funniest film in years.”)
- Zack and Miri Make a Porno (“The funniest movie I’ve seen all year.”)
- Monsters vs. Aliens (“The year’s funniest comedy.”)
- Up (“The funniest movie of the summer.”)
- The Proposal (“Riotously funny! The Proposal is without question the year’s best comedy.”)
It wasn’t the first time he’d called something “pure entertainment” either. (“Pure entertainment!” –City Island, “Pure entertainment with great music, wit and a dream cast!” –A Prairie Home Companion, “Pure entertainment from start to finish.” –High School Musical 3, “The most purely entertaining and inventive animated comedy of the year.” –Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs via).
Since the guy’s reviews are basically mad-lib collections of phrases that got him quoted in the marketing material of previous movies and he has no credibility, studios have stopped citing him as a source, saying it only detracts from the idea that reviews are meaningful in the first place. Haha, just kidding, of course.