HAPPY VETERAN’S DAY FROM JESSICA SIMPSON

By: 11.12.07  •  155 Comments

In Major Movie Star, Jessica Simpson plays a teen idol who loses everything and ends up homeless.  Then she decides to serve in the army, because that’s what homeless people do.

Like In the Army Now meets Legally Blonde, it’s a hilarious Skank-out-of-water flick about one vacuous retard’s journey from the top of the box office to the front line of the war on terror.  You know, something we can all relate to.  It features sassy chicks like Vivica Fox delivering super original one liners like, “I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.”

One soldier serving in Iraq was excited about the project, saying, “It’s about time someone told the truth about the army being all fun and games.  You go girl!”

Ha, “Major Movie Star”, huh?  Who does she report to, “General Admission?”  Ha ch-cha cha cha.

STEVE GUTENBERG IS BACK, BABY!

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