HEY TELL UR MOM TO MOVE HER CAR + Morning Links

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In honor of Ellen Page: How to write a celebrity coming out speech in 10 simple steps |FilmDrunk|

Netflix strikes a deal with Comcast (AKA EMPEROR MEGALOCORP) for direct broadband access |UPROXX|

The best fails of the week |UPROXX Video|

CNN’s ‘Piers Morgan Tonight’ is canceled because no one watches it |Warming Glow|

Mario Kart themed speed skating |With Leather|

Four things the comics industry needs to do in 2014 |Gamma Squad|

KSK Mock Draft: Ban an Olympic Event |Kissing Suzy Kolber|

The Rob Ford Chronicles: Watch the Toronto mayor make a beat live on stage |Smoking Section|

WOMAN KILLED BY TOILET |death&taxes|

Which Magic Mike stripper is your soulmate? |BuzzFeed|

True Detective recap: Open questions and theories after Episode 6, ‘Haunted House’ |Pajiba|

Miley Cyrus blew Abe Lincoln |The Superficial|

Megan Fox named her kid Bodhi Ransom Green |IDLYITW|

Kickass LED beer pong tables, plus 10 things we want |BroBible|

8 worst ‘Simpsons’ characters ever |Guyism|

Insane tongue-twisting rap ‘Alphabet Insanity’ |The Chive|

Famous people with the most extravagant on-set demands |Ranker|

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