It’s not every day that Kris Kristofferson makes FilmDrunk, but then it’s not every day that Kris Kristofferson joins a 3D movie about a dolphin with a prosthetic tail from the director of Air Bud. It’s called A Dolphin’s Tale. It stars Harry Connick Jr. as a marine biologist. It just gets better and better. This is the greatest film synopsis in the history of man kind:
“Dolphin” is inspired by the true story of a dolphin named Winter who was rescued off the Florida coast and taken in by the Clearwater Marine Aquarium. The movie version centers on an introverted, 11-year-old boy who befriends an injured dolphin who lost her tail in a crab trap. Through their bond and friendship, the boy motivates everyone around him to help save the dolphin by creating a prosthetic appendage. The mammal’s strong survival instincts become an inspiration to people with special needs. [Reuters]
Last we heard of it, Morgan Freeman was in negotiations to play the doctor who creates the robotic dolphin tail. Kris Kristofferson will play the father of Harry Connick Jr.’s character, “a single father running an understaffed aquarium.”
I cannot. Wait. For this movie. I pray to God that Kris Kristofferson will play Harry Connick Jr.’s estranged, disapproving, alcoholic father.
KRIS KRISTOFFERSON: I thought I raised me a real son! Then he had to go and die! Now look what I got: Dolphin Kisser M.D.! I wish it was you died in that thresher accident, Harry Connick Jr.!
HARRY CONNICK JR: I’m a marine biologist, Dad! Why can’t you see that?
KRIS KRISTOFFERSON: You were a high-school football star! You had the life I always dreamed of! All laid out for you! You threw it all away! Ya kicked it right down a blowhole!
HARRY CONNICK JR: I DON’T WANT. YER LAHFE. I LOVE DOLPHINS. THEY’RE MAMMALS, DAD! YOU WOULDN’T UNDERSTAND!
Then Professor Harry Connick Jr., MD will nurse the town dolphin back to health with a robotic tail built by Morgan Freeman. As the rehabilitated dolphin swims out to sea for the last time accompanied by cheering crowds, a single tear rolls down Kris Kristofferson’s cheek. He collapses, finally feeling the effects of his life of abuse with a fatal heart attack. Harry Connick Jr. grabs him, holding his head to keep it from hitting the pavement. With his final words, he says, “Son… I’m proud of you.”