NEXT BOLL MOVEMENT WILL HAVE LUKE PERRY

Senior Editor
12.08.08 47 Comments

Uwe Boll with the two people who saw Postal

Details of Uwe Boll’s next project have hit the web (background on Uwe Boll: psychologically imbalanced German B-movie director most famous for taking on critics in a boxing match).

Lauren Holly and Luke Perry star in the $5 million apocalyptic thriller “The Storm,” which German filmmaker Uwe Boll is shooting in Vancouver.  Holly plays a dedicated wife and mother who must deal with the end of days scenario — all heightened by the arrival of a mysterious stranger named Silas (Perry) who holds the key to the approaching doom. [THR/Yahoo]

I want to like Uwe Boll, I really do.  Everyone ganged up on him last year, and despite the fact that his movies are awful, a lot of people who passed around the petition to stop him from making films also called Indiana Jones 4 “Another fun adventure!”  But bottom line: his movies are complete wastes of money.  Who the hell is funding this?  For $5 million, you could feed the homeless, build a robot pterodactyl, pay hookers to pull you around on a rickshaw for a year, buy a yacht, buy a bazooka, buy a yacht just to blow it up with a bazooka… the world is pretty much your oyster.  Instead we’ve got a director famous for being a failure directing a 90210 hasbeen in a script from the Roland Emmerich-reject pile.  God I hate people.

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