Ninja Turtles Getting Michael Bay Makeover

05.28.10 7 years ago 23 Comments

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise will receive yet another reboot, this time as Michael Bay’s Platinum Dunes company has signed on to produce the latest installment of the Heroes in the Half Shell. Nickelodeon purchased the title last year for $60 million, which means that Paramount is now essentially the owner of the turtles. So look for the latest installment to feature Shredder capturing Splinter thanks to a tie-in from Mouse Trap.

There is no word on new plotlines or casting for the latest TMNT films by Platinum Dunes, which I think was also the name of the company we hired for my Bar Mitzvah. The film will return to the original franchise’s roots with a live action version, as opposed to the animated film from 2007. That means Bay and Co. will need to search for a feisty redhead to play the ambitious reporter April O’Neil, and I’d like to suggest Emma Stone on Diora Baird’s shoulders. Or vice versa. I’m not picky.

I’ll take my pizza with anchovies and Spam, Cinema Blend:

You likely know the name Platinum Dunes from the valiant work they’ve done destroying the reputations of perfectly good horror franchises, from the OK Friday the 13th remake last year to the recent dreadful A Nightmare on Elm Street. Platinum Dunes partners Brad Fuller, Andrew Form and Michael Bay will all serve as producers on the new turtles films, which puts Paramount in the Michael Bay business in a big way as the third Transformers film gets cranking.

Growing up, I was a huge fan of the Ninja Turtles cartoon, always hoping that the gang would defeat the evil testicles alien Krang and Shredder. I only hope that Platinum Dunes can tap into what made the cartoon so great in the first place, as well as the failures of the first two films, such as horrible acting, the absence of Rocksteady and Bebop, and super emo Raphael.

But one thing is for sure, this franchise has always brought the super tizzight soundtracks.

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