“This is going to be good” is what the creepy old lady with the mean voice and awful hair tells the poor people in the back of the train right before they’re about to be slaughtered in this most recent trailer for Snowpiercer, which stars Chris Evans as the hero that dystopian poor people need most. Due to hit American theaters on June 27, Snowpiercer was directed by Bong Joon-ho and co-stars Tilda Swinton as the aforementioned mean, old lady, as well as Jaime Bell, John Hurt, Octavia Spencer and Ed Harris, in a tale of a man-made apocalypse that most importantly reminds us all that the wealthiest people must always be protected and have tailors on hand at all time for new suits. Even in the future, there must be fresh, five-button suits.
Unlike most red band trailers, Snowpiercer doesn’t bring us a barrage of curse words to prove how grown up it is, but instead the red is for blood, because a bunch of people are getting their asses chopped up by these ax dudes. But please, FilmDrunk readers in South Korea, don’t spoil the movie for those of us who haven’t seen it yet. Obviously, you can call us idiots for not watching it already, but just don’t spoil it, okay?