Comedian TJ Miller of ‘Silicon Valley’ fame was recently a guest on Doug Benson’s ‘Doug Loves Movies’ podcast (probably the second best podcast about movies behind the FilmDrunk Frotcast) where he discussed working with Michael Bay on ‘Transformers: Age of Extinction,’ in which Miller played “Lucas Flannery.” If you thought working with the dude who Megan Fox once said was “like Hitler on his sets” was a stroll on the beach, well, then you’ve got a messed up idea of beaches, my friend. It was apparently a “very bipolar experience,” according to Miller. And he doesn’t mean because of the rug made out of a two-headed polar bear that Michael Bay makes love on.
“Ya know, he has a specific way of communicating with people. Once he said to me, “Nothing that you’ve said is funny, T.J.! Not one thing all day! We hired you to be funny! There’s 300 people here! None of them are laughing at you! Say something funny! I can still cut you out of the movie!” And I said, “Michael, I would love that because then I would be able to leave right this instant!” And he said, “Say something funny! You haven’t even made the Make-a-Wish kids laugh!” To be fair to him, I hadn’t, and they were standing there like, “This . . . was not our wish.” Then the second the cameras stopped rolling he would say, “Hey, do you wanna get sushi and grab drinks?” It was a very bi-polar experience.” [JoBlo]
Wow, Michael Bay sounds like my subconscious when I’m doing stand-up. “You’re not funny, idiot! Sometimes I wish you were never born! You should crawl in a hole die! Hey, buddy, you look stressed. Here, have a whiskey.”
If TJ Miller had seen any Michael Bay movies, especially ‘Pain & Gain,’ he’d know that the way to make Michael Bay laugh is through ridicule of sub-humans. Midgets, fatties, homos, nerds, Mexicans – the world is his crapestry. Though I do enjoy that Make-A-Wish Kids are apparently his barometer for humor. Like of course it’s not funny if the child with a terminal disease isn’t laughing. I like to imagine Michael Bay constantly making nonsensical similes and analogies all day, like some surrealist Geico ad, but being too powerful and surrounded by yes men for anyone to correct him.