70-year-old Robert DeNiro already let Ben Stiller stab him in the boner for Little Fockers, so why wouldn’t he take his shirt off and box a few rounds with Sly Stallone for Grudge Match? In Grudge Match, aka Gruuughdge Match, Robert Deniro’s Billy “The Kid” McDonnen and Sly Stallone’s Henry “Razor” Sharp split a pair of boxing matches 30 years ago, and now they’re getting back into the ring to settle the score, earn some cash, and give Kevin Hart something to talk really fast about. See?! Old people are useful or whatever!
Here’s the thing: I know there must be some desire in the collective heart of the Hollywood power structure that pushes them to keep making these old-guys-turn-back-the-clock movies – this, The Expendables, Stand Up Guys, The Last Stand, Last Vegas, the last Rocky movie, etc. – but what I don’t get is why they always have to write the meanest, most hacky patronizing old guy jokes into them. Always with the Viagra gags and guys taking the wrong pills and the fat jokes and the HEY GRAMPS, LET’S SEE YOU TRY TO GET A BOXING CUP UNDER THOSE DEPENDS HARF HARF HARF. What kind of masochistic wish fulfillment is this?
You know you’re in for a treat when they put Macklemore in the trailer.
Whatever, I’ve already seen the real-life version of this, where Tank Abbott and Scott Ferrozzo fought in a backyard.