Twilight Breaking Swan 2 Has a Trailer Trailer

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03.21.12 20 Comments

In case you forgot, Twilight is still a thing, there’s still another movie coming out (Twilight Saga Breaking Dawn Part 2, opening November 16th, from director Bill Condon, who, yes, has won an Academy Award for writing), and it’s still such a big deal that they release teasers for the trailer (yes, a trailer for a trailer, basically). This is that teaser. Let me see if I can sum up:

REMAMBER WHEN ADWURD BITE YEW, BALLA? NOW YEW ARE VAMPAHR TOO. HALP ME, BALLA! DON’T LAT LLAMA STEAL OUR SAX BEBE!

Will Edward still love Bella now that her vagina has gone cold? It’s like a metaphor for marriage.

FUN FACT: This YouTube video has almost three million views.

I AM YER HOSE BEND, BALLA. AH LUV YEW WITH ALL MAH VAMPAHR HART. PLEASE ME TO SAX YEW.

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Vince Mancini is a writer, comedian, and podcaster. A graduate of Columbia’s non-fiction MFA program, his work has appeared on FilmDrunk, the UPROXX network, the Portland Mercury, the East Bay Express, and all over his mom’s refrigerator.

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