Probably the easiest criticism of Seth MacFarlane’s “sexist” “We Saw Your Boobs” song from the Oscars is “why couldn’t it have been about MEN, huh, Oppressor?” It is a valid one. After all, male nudity has been all the rage these past few years, from Jason Segel’s comedic dong play in Forgetting Sarah Marshall to the Fassmember’s unforgettable turn in Shame. Such presence, that penis. Why couldn’t the song have been about men?
To that end, flowy-locked New York software developer Kevin Gisi has released his own gender-swapped version of “We Saw Your Boobs,” called “We Saw Your Junk.” If I had one criticism of this, it’s that he doesn’t use Harvey Keitel for the breakdown. Come on! If ever there was a male Kate Winslet, it’s Harvey Keitel. Harvey Keitel’s penis has been in The Piano (which he mentions), Bad Lieutenant, and Ulysses’ Gaze, and those are just the ones I can think of off the top of my head. I’m sure Harvey Keitel’s penis has been a bunch of places, places I can’t even imagine.
If I had a second criticism of this, it would be WHY ISN’T A WOMYN SINGING IT, HUH? Is it because Kevin Gisi doesn’t think women are funny? Is it because he thinks women can’t sing? Oh yeah, nice one, dude, I guess you’ve never heard of Taylor Swift or Aretha Franklin. If a woman sang this, YouTube would probably only pay her 70% of a man’s ad-sharing, because that’s the world we live in. That’s the reality. Kevin Gisi is probably some jock redneck who thinks women should just stay in the kitchen baking and popping out babies and not singing, and it’s just such typical bullshit that a white man has co-opted female culture and silenced women of color and stolen the voice of the disenfranchised yet again. I mean look at his hair! What’s that about? Is he mocking women? How is this any different from blackface? This whole video is like cultural rape. At the very least, it’s promoting a culture of cultural rape. Shame on you, Kevin, you bully rapist.