One year before Robin Thicke really hit mainstream success with his mega-hit, the controversial date rape anthem “Blurred Lines,” his career seemed to be stuck in a cycle of moderate successes. And most of his successes were dismissed by the mainstream as being the result of nepotism. (“If MY dad was Alan Thicke I’d be a semi-famous R&B singer too! He probably just used those Alan Thicke connections to get famous. I mean, come on?! His dad is Alan motherfucking Thicke!”) It’s safe to say that in the summer of 2012, Robin’s career was going through a bit of an identity crisis. This must have prompted him to ponder “what would daddy do?”, because that year Robin decided it was time to introduce the world to Robin Thicke: Hollywood leading man.
The movie was called “Abby in the Summer” (I say was because the title was later changed to “Making the Rules“) and, according to a column written by Vulture’s Kyle Buchanan, it is so ridiculously bad that you “simply must watch” the movie.
Making the Rules stars Jaime Pressly as Abby, an unhappily married Los Angeles chef who’s tempted into an affair when she runs into her ex Shaun (played by Thicke) and finds out that he is now a successful Silver Lake hairdresser. “Is married life everything you thought it would be?” teases Shaun. “Your husband, is he nice to you?” The answer to both of those questions is a big no, and so Abby and Shaun begin boning (also a big no), though their physical acts of coitus remain blessedly offscreen. Eventually a pregnancy scare prompts Abby to ask herself, “Is it really a good idea to have this much sex with Robin Thicke?” and so she stops. The movie, which looks like it cost $5 to make, is over after 73 minutes.
Here is what you will find in Robin Thicke’s bag of acting tricks:
1. Constant, unbroken staring
2. Whispered dialogue
3. A willingness to back up and begin again in the middle of a biffed line
4. Tall hair
Some people have trouble sitting through movies from the “so bad, it’s good” genre, but as someone who has seen Tommy Wiseau’s masterpiece ‘The Room‘ more than 50 times I can say confidently that I am going to heed the Vulture writer’s advice and see this monstrosity. And if you are not yet convinced as to how bad Robin’s acting is in this movie, check out this clip reel (and notice how many time Robin says “Abby”):
That. Was. Glorious! I am tempted to say something snarky about the apples falling far from trees, but I think that might be overstating Alan Thicke’s acting abilities a little. However, at least Alan Thicke was competent at both acting and singing. Whereas, if this clip reel is any indication, Robin Thicke has somehow f*cked up a role that was seemingly written with him in mind. I can’t wait to watch this movie and see just how bad it gets. I haven’t been this excited about watching a bad movie since I saw the trailer for ‘Fateful Findings‘ earlier this year. This is going to be a good year for bad cinema.