The recent J.J. Abrams Star Trek movie was a big success (to the tune of nearly 400 million dollars) and a big budget sequel is coming in 2013, which begs the question, when are we getting a new Star Trek TV series? Traditionally Star Trek has been primarily a TV-based franchise — it just seems weird to be getting these movies without a Trek show on the air.
Now, rumor has it a new Star Trek TV show may happen after the release of the next movie, but what this show’s premise will be is unknown. Well, just in case they’re still taking suggestions, I have a few ideas for new Trek TV shows…
Star Trek: The Next Next Generation
It’s unlikely they’ll convince the cast of the new Trek movies to do a TV show, so how about a J.J. Abrams lens flare filled version of Next Generation? Really sex up the ol’ Enterprise D. Start with Christina Hendricks as Beverly and take it from there.
I have some ideas for changes to the standard Starfleet uniform as well.
Star Trek: SCSI (Space Crime Scene Investigation)
There’s always somebody being murdered in Star Trek — are we to believe Worf solved the hundred or so murders that happened on Next Generation by himself? Come on, that guy couldn’t catch a cold. There must be some sort of galactic CSI unit out there, and I want to see them solving crimes in all their sexy glory.
Star Trek: SCSI: SVU
A lot like Star Trek: SCSI, except more rapey and uncomfortable to watch with your family.
Star Trek: SCSI: SVU: NY
A lot like Star Trek: SCSI: SVU except on the mean streets of Noo Yawk (New York is officially renamed Noo Yawk sometime in the 22nd century).
Star Trek: Just More Deep Space 9
This is the one I’m really pulling for.
Star Trek: Star Wars
Some Star Wars fans may chafe at the suggestion that Star Trek should just take over the Star Wars universe, but come on, admit it, it couldn’t be any worse than what’s being done to it now. Phasers, blasters, Ewoks, tribbles, it’s all the same anyways.
We’ve got J. J. Abrams, you’ve got this guy. We win.
Star Trek: Ferengi Fun!
A series devoted to everyone’s favorite Star Trek alien race, the Ferengi! You may not know all 285 Rules of Acquisition now, but you certainly will after Ferengi Fun runs for 10 seasons!
Star Trek: This Old Warp Core with Geordi LaForge
For the technobabble fans out there — just episode after episode of Geordi puttering around engineering fixing deflector arrays while spouting massive blocks of total nonsense.
Star Trek: Smoke