Warner Brothers, Legendary Pictures, and Toho have announced the release date for their new Godzilla movie which they teased at San Diego Comic-Con with footage First Showing said “could be the most realistic and grounded approach to Godzilla yet.” The press release predictably promises they “will return the character to its epic roots with a gritty, realistic actioner.” That wording, and the announcement that this will be 3D, makes me want punch a building into the sea. Can we all agree the word actioner is a buzzword that needs to die, preferably dousing itself with gasoline then hugging the word gritty and setting both alight?
Rage about press release language aside, this version of Godzilla will be written by David Callaham (The Expendables), David Goyer (the Dark Knight trilogy), and Max Borenstein (The Seventh Son). Gareth Edwards, who was snapped up after a financially-successful debut with Monsters, will direct.
They just announced a release date of May 16th, 2014. That’s the same opening day as the Michael Bay produced Ninja Turtles remake. Wait, two mutated reptile movies in one weekend? My emotions!
They should settle who gets to open that weekend with a dance battle:
Or a basketball game:
Or just leave them competing for the same weekend and we’ll just have to DEAL WITH IT.