The 7 Games You Need To Assemble Your Video Game Expendables

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Lionsgate

The Expendables return this week to cash another paycheck — er, I mean, have another exciting adventure — and, unsurprisingly, most of these big action movie icons have had a number of video games to their name.

So, I thought it’d be fun to pick the best video game each of the movie’s major cast members has appeared in/inspired, thus creating a super team of video games you can entertain yourself with after you’ve experienced The Expendables 3 this weekend. Here’s the seven games you’ll need to build your video game Expendables…

Jason Statham

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Lionsgate

Call of Duty (2003)

Yup, Jason Statham did voice work for Call of Duty waaay back when the series was still set during World War II and merely quite popular, not absurdly world-consuming popular. Sadly a Crank movie was never made — woulda liked to see the quicktime events for that one.

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Wesley Snipes

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20th Century Fox

White Men Can’t Jump (1995)

Yes, they made a White Men Can’t Jump video game (exclusively for the Atari Jaguar no less). I’ve never played it, and there’s a good chance it’s terrible, but it earns its spot on this list merely for existing.

Ronda Rousey

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UFC

EA Sports UFC (2014)

Ronda Rousey is one of the few stars in the movie that didn’t first make her name during the Carter administration, and appropriately, her game is the most recent on the list as well. In fact, EA Sports UFC came out less than a month ago, and is picking up decent reviews, so if you’re looking for a game that doesn’t require re-hooking up old consoles or messing with emulators, this is it.

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Jet Li

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Lionsgate

Jet Li: Rise to Honor (2004)

Rise to Honor kind of and came and went without much fanfare, but I recall thinking it was pretty good. It had fairly nice graphics for the time, and even though it’s an original story, it’s full of allusions and references to Jet’s most famous movies and moments.

Harrison Ford

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Disney

Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis (1992)

Harrison Ford is a cranky old man who probably still has several unprogrammed VCRs sitting at home, but he’s been in a ton of video games. Choosing the best one would be a tough call if it weren’t for the fact that LucasArts made two Indiana Jones adventure games, so obviously it’s down to those. I’m giving the nod to Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis since it had an original story and thus was marginally more unexpected and exciting than LucasArts’ Last Crusade game.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger

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Lionsgate

Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1992)

Arnold Schwarzenegger has also had a ton of video games to his name, but unlike Harrison Ford, Arnie’s games were almost exclusively total garbage. The one shining exception is, of course, the arcade version of Terminator 2: Judgement Day. If an arcade happens to have this game (and they all do) it’s pretty much a guarantee I’m going to quickly waste five dollars on it.

Sylvester Stallone

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Lionsgate

Rocky (2002)

I love me a good arcade boxing game, and this one was a solid example of the genre. The game lets you fight pretty much any guy seen or even offhand mentioned throughout the series and includes clips and music from the movies, giving the game that authentic cheesy Rocky feel. The sequel, Rocky Legends was pretty worthwhile too.

Any games from the stars of The Expendables that you think ought to be included? Is there a really rockin’ Dolph Lundgren game out there that I missed? Hit the comments and fill me in.

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