Want to Hear About Tim Kring’s Terrible New Show?

This is the high concept version of Tim Kring’s new show: “Rain Man” meets “24” only not that godawful Bruce Willis movie “Mercury Rising”.

Think we can’t make it sound worse? We haven’t gotten to the details yet!

Kiefer Sutherland plays a former journalist who, after screwing up one story, instead of writing books and magazine fluff pieces like other journalists who screw up, becomes a baggage handler because otherwise he’s one of those Hollywood elites that Fox News complains about. He has an autistic son who doesn’t talk because that way you have a better choice of child actors.

Said son is so good with numbers he can predict lottery numbers, which makes you wonder, yet again, why Kiefer is fondling Samsonite for a living. Oh, also, the autistic kid’s mom was killed in the September 11th attacks, the day Kiefer and mommy, who will probably turn out to be a ghost or something, were going to see a divorce lawyer.

Kiefer finds a disgraced scientist who says that his son can actually sense electromagnetic energy and thus can see the “beauty of the entire universe”, and a social worker who believes him because the kid somehow predicts her mom’s cell number, and together they fight crime.

No. Seriously. That’s not reciting a tired joke. They fight crime, or prevent tragedies, or whatevs.

We haven’t told you the best part. The show is called “Touch”.

[ via the remarkably straight-faced writers at io9 ]

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