Young Joaquin Phoenix Waxes Chumps Like a Candle

Entertainment Editor
04.09.10 3 Comments

Joaquin Phoenix, awesome actor and not-quite-as-awesome rapper, starred as Billy Hercules in an episode of Superboy in 1989 (clip below, via Unreality).  You might be wondering why I’m posting a clip that old.  Well, it’s because it contains something that is always timely:  Joaquin Phoenix straight up murders a punk for steppin’.  Awww yeah son.  M.C. Leafy Leaf is going to write a song about this.  Casey’ll film it.  TMZ be all like, “daaaaaaaamn.”

Non sequitur trivia:  Joaquin Phoenix was once rescued from a car crash by Werner Herzog.  How were those two able to touch without melting into a pile of otherworldly goo like Ron Silver in TimeCop?

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When not writing for Uproxx, Caleb likes to volunteer at the legless cat shelter and photoshop the Babadook into all of his family photos. He once resolved the question “To be or not to be?” through the clever use of General Semantics. Your mom thinks you could be more like him if you only applied yourself.

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