Alex Baze is the head writer for “Weekend Update” on “SNL,” so it should come as no surprise that his Twitter is one of the sharpest and most hilarious feeds around. Alex”s jokes tend to be darkly clever with a self-deprecating bent — and sometimes his mother comes to visit for the sole purpose of blessing her son”s followers with gems such as, “”Oh, he went to LA? But you sent the email to New York. He’s not gonna get it.”
Alex tweets as @bazecraze, presumably because @bazeamaze was already taken by a tween or a gardening enthusiast. Here are ten of Alex”s finest 140-character missives:
10. I’d like to have a child one day. Two days, tops.
9. I hope you’re using all the time you save by saying “totes” instead of a “totally” to learn a trade.
8. I wouldn’t mind going to Coachella and walking around in a business suit yelling “Ashley?? Ashley, come home!”
7. I like how we say “vegan” now instead of “eating disorder”.
6. Dr. Oz is going to tell you how to lose weight! Step one: watch TV at 4pm.
5. Hey Christmas, either start later or get more songs.
4. Is there any proof that Joe Biden isn’t just a big yellow lab?
3. “Here comes Honey Boo Boo,” whispered a meth dealer in 2019.
2. This coffee is so strong it just raised 5 children on a nurse’s salary.
1. I admire your goal, but remember, if you blow it, now Hitler has a time machine.