‘Big Brother’ recap: The girls are suspicious, but is it too late?

07.10.13 4 years ago 11 Comments

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I’m torn between feeling respect for the Moving Company on the one hand and wanting to throw rocks at their heads on the other. That they’ve so easily taken control of the house, and no one except Candice (and her super duper snooper skills) has sussed it out is impressive, but ultimately depressing. Any time an alliance becomes this powerful this early, it makes for a boring show as we wait for the inevitable to come to pass. Unless the show producers interfere (which they shouldn’t), I fear this season will just lope predictably to its finish, when the five guys stand together, snickering over their excellent game play.

Anyway, we pick up where we left off, with Aaryn cackling at her “brilliant” move to put Helen and Elissa on the block and Helen swearing to take Aaryn out. A little later, she backpedals and says that trying to take out the person who nominated you is simply stupid, but that’s because she’s 1) calmed down a little and 2) realizes what Aaryn seems to figure out as well — a secret alliance between the two of them would be completely unexpected by the rest of the house. It’s pretty brilliant, and I just wish it didn’t involve Aaryn, who I’d like to leave the house immediately. 

As for Jeremy, he can’t WAIT to send all the girls home. I’m wondering if he’s just as eager to send home Kaitlin, who seems to be his cuddle buddy at this point. I’m guessing that McCrae is equally reluctant to send Amanda packing, and he’s hoping he’ll someday be able to get to second base with her, which he probably hasn’t accomplished outside of actual baseball. 

The MVP is, yet again, Elissa. Okay, woman, don’t let us down! Don’t be asking Aaryn what she wants! Don’t be yapping about your MVP status! Elissa tells Helen, but makes her swear to keep it a secret — until, yes, Elissa goes yapping about it all over the house. Still, she does want to make a smart move, and that would be putting Jeremy on the block. I’m not sure she’d be able to convince everyone to vote for Jeremy instead of her or Helen, but if it’s ever going to happen, now might be the time. 

Oh, enough with all this strategy! Let’s check on simmering showman’s, or lack thereof. GinaMarie likes Nick. Nick does not like GinaMarie (so, add her to the Jessie list of rejects). GinaMarie does not get the hint, though I will say it’s not a very strong hint. She asks him to take a shower with her (he refuses). She eats a popsicle seductively while he watches. She promises him an amazing kiss — and he tells her that it can’t happen with people around to see. Have we determined whether he even likes girls? Or maybe he’s just holding out for Mary Jane (you know, being Peter Parker and all).

Time to pick players for the Veto competition. Yay. Ooh, the third nominee is announced… and it’s Jeremy. He doesn’t seem overly upset, though, because he knows he’s super awesome.

The other two players in the veto competition are Amanda and Nick. Nick is so excited! He’s going to do anything he can to help Jeremy. Of course he is. The host will be GinaMarie. 

Elissa is worried Jeremy will win the veto. Unfortunately, she should be. As he describes it, he’s a manimal and he plans to win it. “Guard your meat, because I’m coming to eat,” he says, which makes me wonder if he’s going to chew on the other housemates. I wouldn’t put it past him. Though, given the nasty, anti-Semitic things he’s said on the live feed, he’ll probably check to make sure no one is Jewish first. 

In other ridiculous smack talk new, Aaryn calls her a fembot bitch. I’m guessing we should be happy she didn’t come up with something worse.

Elisssa talks to Nick about making a two way deal for him to throw the veto. “Please give Helen and I a chance!” she pleads to a completely unreceptive audience. He takes the deal, because it’s a can’t lose proposition — if he loses, she won’t put him up, and if he wins, he saves Jeremy. Ugh. I really wish it wasn’t so easy for the Moving Company to dominate, oh, everything.

Then, a montage of Howard praying for people. I will say, I haven’t seen Howard being a jackass the way the rest of the Moving Company has been. I just wonder for how long he’ll be able to deal with the other guys. 

The hamsters have a message from Brittany from season 12 — she’s hugely pregnant! She needs everyone to get her nursery together, and thus we have the segue to the veto competion. Gina Marie is wearing a diaper and a baby bonnet. And high heels and a bikini top. Um, I’m going to have nightmares from this, but I’m sure this is EXACTLY some guy’s fetish somewhere. Everyone else is wearing footie pajamas. The game is about balancing stuffed animals on a mobile. 

Jeremy thinks it’s hard to stay in beast mode when you’re in a huge lavender onesie. Jeremy, FYI, a onesie just snaps between your legs. Footie pajamas. Jeez. Anyway, Amanda almost has it, but no, Jeremy figures it out first. Dammit! For someone who says during every competition she needs to win it, Elissa is pretty disappointing.

Kaitlin is afraid she’s going to be backdoored, and she looks to Jeremy for comfort. And making out. He assures her she’s not going anywhere, probably to keep the making out going. So, they make out, then she worries, then they make out again, then she worries. Jeremy feels that he can’t even enjoy his victory! 

And then, he makes a critical error, which seems to be caused by thinking with his little head instead of his big one. He’s going to save Kaitlin, so he starts giving orders to the rest of the Moving Company. Nick no likee. Howard no like. McCrae no like. Spencer doesn’t care. But now Jeremy has given his alliance a reason to get rid of him sooner than they might have otherwise. 

With Jeremy having won the veto, Elissa needs to pick a replacement. Candice wants Elissa to put up Nick. But Elissa doesn’t want to go against her word! Dammit, Elissa! Have we completely wasted the MVP on you for two weeks in a row?

But, when Elissa goes to check in with Nick, he won’t say anything to Elissa about how he’s going to vote. He’s a non-gamer, as he puts it, and he has not put on his game face. Except, you know, by putting on his game face constantly. He needs time to think. Elissa, don’t trust him! And she doesn’t seem to trust him, but she’s let us down before.

Time for the veto meeting. Sigh. Jeremy has decided not to use the power of veto… on Helen or Elissa. But he’s saving himself. What an ass. Anyay, the MVP has secretly chosen to replace him with… NICK! Yes! Finally, things might, for just one tiny moment, get interesting this season!

Helen warns, “Watch out, Nick. The Mom Squad has assembled, and it’s going to send Nick right out of the house.” I’m not so sure, really but Candice thinks the girls might be able to come together. Given that GinaMarie and Jessie are so busy trying to jump Nick’s bones, things don’t look good for Elissa. While she hasn’t wowed me with her game play (for someone who said she wasn’t going to blab about her MVP status, she certainly didn’t do a very good job of keeping it to herself), for her to stay in the game will take some tricky moves — and at this point, any moves beyond the great stroke of luck and timing that created the Moving Company will be welcome. Can we finally let the games begin?

Do you think Elissa will be sent home? Do you think this season needs another twist? What do you think of the Moving Company? 

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