So VH1 has managed to round up yet another passel of Hollywood”s D-list for a fifth season of “Celebrity Rehab.” The mildly familiar names who will be gracing us with their detox vomiting and general grumpiness beginning Sunday, June 26 at 9 p.m. are Sean Young (“Bladerunner”), Michael Lohan (Lindsay”s dad), Bai Ling (“The Crow), Amy Fisher (the infamous Long Island Lolita), Jeremy Jackson (“Baywatch”), Dwight Gooden, Jessica Kipper (“Survivor”) and relapsing alumnus Steven Adler (Guns n” Roses).
Every season I”m pretty sure the show has scraped the bottom of the barrel in looking for so-called stars, but this time the show may want to change its title to “People You”ve Never Heard of Rehab” or “We Consider Someone Who Shoots A Woman in the Head with an Arrow and Made A Porn Movie A Celebrity Rehab.” Sorry, Amy. But as hard as it is to convince even foggy-brained addicts to appear on a show for questionable exposure and free counseling, I”m sure it”s only going to get harder. The deaths of Alice in Chains rocker Mike Starr (season 3) and Jeff Conaway (seasons 1 and 2) earlier this year cast a sizable shadow on the show. As many times as Dr. Drew warned his wards (and, indirectly, us) that recovering addicts often slip with sometimes fatal consequences, these deaths (granted, Conaway”s autopsy is not yet in) made it clear that even Dr. Drew”s level-headed assistance is not a miracle cure. For better or for worse, the participants on “Celebrity Rehab” aren”t just mugging for the cameras.