Watch: Christina Aguilera’s trashy ‘Your Body’ vid will blow… your mind

09.28.12 5 years ago 5 Comments


If Christina Aguilera’s freaky sex were a criminal, it’d be a serial killer. That’s the point of “Your Body,” which is equal parts “I Love Lucy” slapstick, Snooki and Beyonce’s trailer park pin-up “Party” vid.

The colorful clip is automatically filed under “farce” with its initial warning, that no men were harmed in the making of this video. It’s funny, ’cause men are sort of like animals, right? Anyway, it’s nasty from the top, with Aguilera writhing in her campiest Strawberry fashions in the promise of a “killer week,” trolling the bars with her lip gloss-dripping mug and gel tips, preying on stubble-sexy bro-dudes for playtime in cars, mens’ bathrooms and cheap motels. And then she murders them, with an explosion of pink smoke and glitter or gratuitous splashes of blue semen-paint, strategically dripping from her mouth.

If Aguilera hadn’t done vids like vag-flashing “Dirrty” or bondage bedraggled “Not Myself Tonight” in her previous incarnations, this wouldn’t be very funny. It’d hint at several layers of boardroom-inspired desperation, with glossies of Aguilera vandalized with penises drawn on her face. But this song is a hit, she’s roared through the youth of promiscuous folly, and arrived on the other side now winking at herself and winking at us.

The downside to this video — directed by Rihanna’s “We Found Love” helmer Melina Matsoukas — is the obviousness of reference at the end, as Aguilera bodaciously sucks off on her cereal spoon, watching cartoons and flipping to Lucille Ball’s face. No, really, we get it: sex and violence are natural bedfellows, but comedy also frequently climbs in to complete the trois. It doesn’t need to be spelled out.

This romp through a field of cliches is brought to you by the folks at RCA, who will drop Aguilera’s next album “Lotus” in November.

Do you like it? HOW MUCH DO YOU LIKE IT??!

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