‘Glee’ recap: ‘Glee, Actually’

Holiday episodes should be a cinch for “Glee.” It’s the perfect time of year to get all sentimental and romantic and musical.

But “Glee” never needs an excuse to celebrate great songs, the bonds of friendship and family, and warm and fuzzy feelings, and maybe that’s why the show has paradoxically never produced a great Christmas episode. How do you make something seem special when it’s what you do all the time?

“Glee, Actually” represents the third stab at a Christmas episode following Season 2’s “A Very Glee Christmas” (with the sweet revelation that Brittany still believes in Santa and the infamous Sue Sylvester as the Grinch parody) and Season 3’s “Extraordinary Merry Christmas” (which had some clever moments lost amidst an overall mess of an episode).

“Actually” is a definite improvement on “Extraordinary,” if not quite a match for “Very.” But I liked the idea and wish someone had thought of it back when the show was still working, and the characters were still worth caring about.

Since the episode was divided into five non-overlapping segments, it didn’t feel so much like its supposed inspiration, “Love, Actually,” than it did like a collection of short stories from the “Glee” universe. And that approach oddly made for one of “Glee’s” more cohesive and consistent hours in quite some time.

Artie’s “It’s a Wonderful Life”-style dream sequence imagining what would’ve happened if the glee club never existed was the most fun the show has had since the whole cast swapped characters when Tina knocked herself out in “Props.” I never thought we’d see Jessalyn Gilsig again, but there she was, nailing her cameo and clutching a fake baby as Terri Schuester. And Damian McGinty’s return as Rory was an even more welcome sight — he’s an actor and singer with greater natural charm than anyone “Glee” has added to the show since.

It’s too bad that director Adam Shankman couldn’t figure out a way to give Kevin McHale’s “Feliz Navidad” solo at least half the creativity and energy of Artie’s unforgettable “Safety Dance” from Season 1, but at least we got to see McHale perform *something* on his own for the first time this season. And let’s just skip over the fact that this sequence totally ignored Santana ever existed (was Naya Rivera busy this week?) and totally went *there* with Quinn (you know if the writers knew Dianna Agron was never coming back they’d love to kill Quinn off for real, just to put a period on an endlessly tortured character arc).

Meanwhile, in New York, Rachel made a brief appearance in a ridiculous outfit to say a few lines and then disappear for the rest of the hour. (Remember when Rachel and Finn were the stars of “Glee,” and some fans complained about how much screen time they had even though Lea Michele and Cory Monteith were never less than completely reliable and interesting to watch?)

The real focus in New York was on Kurt and his relationships with Burt and Blaine. This is the second time Mike O’Malley has appeared this season, and the second time the show has used him to try to manufacture the sort of tear-jerking emotion that used to flow naturally from Kurt and Burt’s touching father-son bond.

Burt has cancer now! Sad! But he invited Blaine to see Kurt in New York! Sweet!

The only reason the silly storyline works at all is because O’Malley, Chris Colfer and Darren Criss play it completely real. Even in its best days, “Glee” often relied on talented actors to overcome sloppy writing, and this segment stayed true to that spirit. Colfer was especially good at silently conveying Kurt’s mixed emotions at seeing Blaine again, and the conflicted feelings Kurt still has about their relationship. Colfer and Criss’ “White Christmas” duet was a’ight, I guess, but there was nothing in the episode that came anywhere close to Rachel’s “O Holy Night” in last week’s not-Christmas episode.

What else?

Oh yeah, Sam and Brittany got married. In the episode’s goofiest thread, the dim-witted “soulmates” decided to make the most of the few days they had left before the inevitable 2012 apocalypse and got hitched (by Coach Bieste!). Sadly, it turned out to be a ruse. No apocalypse. No wedding.

I have to admit, I was disappointed. Since “Glee” insists on forcing these two together — and I can’t complain about any screen time for Chord Overstreet and/or Heather Morris — why not just go totally cuckoo in classic “Glee” style and get them involved in some kind of “What Happens in Vegas” rom-com mix-up where they get married first and fall in love later? At least it would give them a believable excuse to spend time together.

Also, there was another terrible subplot for Sue (I’m really losing patience waiting for the announcement that Jane Lynch is ditching this sinking ship for good) and believable enough bonding between the Puckerman half-brothers, which ended with the promise we’ll be seeing more of Mark Salling in the future. (Yay? I guess? I’ve always liked Salling, and the show has generally done right by Puck, even when he’s involved in stupid things like sleeping with Shelby, but is he really the character most in need of extra screen time at this point?)

We also met Aisha Tyler as Jake’s mom and saw more of Puck’s mom (Gina Hecht) than in her previous two appearances (“Mash-Up” and “Goodbye”) combined. Both actresses were perfectly fine. Maybe we’ll see them again. Maybe they’ll vanish. You never know with “Glee.”

But I do know this: This is my last “Glee” recap for HitFix. If you’ve been following along with me this season, I appreciate it and I feel your pain. I didn’t want to take on the task of writing about “Glee” on a weekly basis just to complain about how terrible it is. The Internet has enough of that. But I had no idea what was in store for me this season. I’ve lost my connection with the show, and I need to reclaim the recapping time for other endeavors. I’m thrilled I had this opportunity, and I’m sure HitFix will have someone great to pick it up in 2013.

Assuming the world doesn’t end next week.

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