Grammy Awards 2013: No ifs, ands or butts, according to dress code

We”ve really come a long way since Cole Porter wrote “a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking” for “Anything Goes.”

Now we live in a world where CBS has to send out an official memo to any talent -presenters and performers- appearing on air during the 55th Annual Grammy Awards telecast on Feb. 10.

[More after the jump…]

The memo leaked yesterday and is a reminder to all involved that CBS Program Practices ask that:

“…buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could  possibly expose female breast nipples. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure.”

Regarding the last part, are they talking butt cheeks or even something more explicit (since they already referenced butt cheeks with the ever so delicate ”bare fleshy undercurves of the buttocks”), like certain lady parts that underwear-adverse starlets keep “accidentally” flashing?

Regardless, the memo is making the rounds today. What we don”t know is if this is an advisory that gets circulated every year and just happened to leak this year or if the recent rage of side boobs on the red carpet at awards shows prompted the missive. (We’ve asked a Grammy spokesperson and are waiting to hear back).

I”m of two minds: to be sure, CBS wants to avoid any fines for indecency caused by, in this case, intentional wardrobe malfunctions, and that”s fine. But this is the music industry. A shirt with a collar passes for formal wear. For artists who pride themselves on showing as much skin as possible, asking them to cover up is tantamount to asking them to wear a nun”s habit.

Part of the fun of watching any awards show is seeing what everyone is wearing and if they wear something wildly inappropriate. Heck, it”s what we all live for.  When an artist is giving a performance during “the biggest night in music,” what if their interpretation of their song includes wearing something that might show a little more skin than CBS would like? Would Pink”s amazing acrobatic performance of “Glitter in the Air” at the 2010 Grammys where she ultimately stripped down to a flesh-colored leotard with white ribbons over her R-Rated bits now be banned?

On the other hand, when you think about it, is it really that unreasonable to ask stars to leave the Daisy Dukes at home and to bring the underwear? Dress fashion forward but also with some modicum of taste? In some ways, it is absolutely ridiculous that an official memo has to go out telling artists not a plan a nip slip on Sunday night.

The one artist we don”t need to worry about is Justin Timberlake, since he”ll undoubtedly come dressed in a “Suit & Tie.”

What do you think? Would Pink”s lauded 2010 performance violate the memo?

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