How To Handle (Terrible) Ninjas According To FX’s “Archer”

12.03.13 4 years ago


With the latest season of Archer bearing down on us like Tom Cruise in a fighter jet circa 1986, the marketing team has been hard at work. A series of videos have been released on their YouTube channel, mimicking the orientation videos of old and continuing the important work of muddying exactly what year Archer takes place in.

Their latest effort teaches new ISIS employees ask how do you avoid the danger of Mutant Turtles..wait…no.

Well what about them? The answer is obvious. Just ignore them and they’ll go away. These losers just want attention to compensate for failing their test to become ninjas. Because let’s be honest:

But the real story isn’t ISIS and their sub-par assassin infestation. No. The real story is between the lines.

For example ISIS is a ticking time bomb of building code violations, putting all these poor people at more risk.

Not to mention the imminent threat of multiple sexual harassment lawsuits originating in the research and development department. DUDE NO.

It’s only a matter of time until either ninjas or Johnny Law catches up to this racket, and my money is on the latter.

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