Reality TV Roundup: ‘Amazing Race’ gets a winner, ‘Survivor’ goes with God and some ‘Real Housewives’ prepare to fight

Welcome to Reality TV Roundup — a quick look at some of the reality TV-centric stories that have recently popped up across the fine, old Interwebs. Click away, my couch potato friends. But before you do…
SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT! One more time: SPOILER ALERT. If you watch “The X Factor,” “Survivor,” “Top Chef,” “Project Accessory” or “America’s Next Top Model,” the latest elimination for each show is revealed in the text below. The hope is that, if you missed this week’s program and would rather clear out your DVR than watch the episode, you can get a quick hit here. But don’t come crying to me if you find out something you didn’t want to know. You’ve been warned. Also note: lots of non-competition reality info lurks below, too.
 
COMPETITION REALITY SHOWS
 
SURVIVOR

 
Brandon wins the immunity idol, then gives it away… and gets voted out. Coach says it’s God’s will.

Coach talks about God and other stuff.

Want some spoilers for the finale Sunday? Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

Remember Richard Hatch? Now that he’s out of jail, he wants on to “The Amazing Race.” And to do a series about sperm bank babies. No comment.

Oh, and Richard Hatch says he would have won the All-Stars edition instead of Boston Rob. So there.
 
THE AMAZING RACE

After getting lucky last week, Ernie and Cindy win the whole enchilada.

Marcus and Armani talk with HitFix about the insanely frustrating flight simulator challenge.

Jeremy and Sandy talk with HitFix about the hell of watching themselves get so close to the win. Yeah, that’s gotta suck. 

THE X FACTOR

The final four perform, Paula cries and Burrito Josh returns to form. Read all about it in this recap.

We knew it was coming. Marcus gets the boot.

Simon Cowell admits he considered hooking up with Paula. You may all turn your heads to vomit now.

AMERICA’S GOT TALENT

Howard Stern will be replacing Piers Morgan as a judge. Let the games begin!

THE BACHELOR

Ben admits he was “open to the idea” of proposing again. Yeah, we’ve heard (see below).
 
SPOILER: Want to know who Ben proposes to so you don’t have to watch the whole damn season? Find out here. 

DANCING WITH THE STARS

J.R. Martinez has an even bigger win ahead — he’s going to be a dad.
 
TOP CHEF
Nyesha pays the price for Dakota’s undercooked venison and they both get sent home in a double elimination.

THE BIGGEST LOSER

Want to see something ugly? Tune in when the show pits couples against one another. Yes, that’s something that should inspire weight loss — divorce!

 
NON-COMPETITION REALITY TV SHOWS
 
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF BEVERLY HILLS

It’s dueling girls’ weekends in Las Vegas! There are Chippendales dancers! And there’s bowling! It’s madness!

Taylor Armstrong watches violent video while she hopes we watch her. Ick, Taylor. Is there anything you won’t do for publicity? 

 
THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ATLANTA

Kim has her baby, but big whoop – Sheree ends up in court and blames Phaedra when things don’t go her way.

 
MISC.
 
Can you pick out the fake reality TV show? Good luck (and don’t scroll to the comments until you guess).

“Extreme Makeover: Home Edition” gets the ax. Now who will build ridiculous luxury McMansions for poor people? 

Janice Dickinson has a new show: “Sober Model House.” No, we didn’t make that up, either.

“Fear Factor” is the same as ever — and yet, the ratings are great by NBC’s standards.

Lowe’s defends its decision to pull advertising from “All-American Muslim.” 

Giuliana Rancic is recovering from a double mastectomy. Send good thoughts her way.

In more depressing news, the Duggars held a memorial for their miscarried fetus.

Kim Kardashian is voted the most ill-mannered person of the year. Duh.

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