Recap: ‘America’s Next Top Model’ – ‘Kyle Hagler’

11.11.10 7 years ago

The CW

We”re down to five contestants for this high-fashion cycle of “ANTM,” and the competition is getting heated!

Poor Chris; she has the best personality of the remaining contestants, and she”s clearly the weakest of the bunch right now, next to maybe what”s-her-name. That girl. What”s that girl”s name? Jane.

The other remaining contestants are just real excited to be in Milan, except for Ann, who just has to be too tall for all the medieval-era buildings.

[Full recap of Wednesday’s (Nov. 10) “Top Model” after the break…]

Anyway. Tyra sits the girls down with their portfolios to tell then what not to do. Like, for example, if an agent takes bad photos out of your book, don”t leave the office and then put the photo back in said book. Tyra did that once, and she almost wallowed in catalogue-girl hell forever.

It”s go-see day! Usual rules. Go see as many heavily-accented potential clients as possible, get back in time, or else. And don”t hang around too long kissing ass at Versace, where a guy named Angelo has yet to meet you but already doesn”t like you.

Several of the girls realize they cannot find Versace. Which is odd, because it”s Milan, which means every single street probably leads to Versace. In fact, at one point, Kayla tries to find someplace other than Versace and fails.

“Her look is little bit two seasons ago,” Angelo snipes about Chelsey.

Angelo likes Ann, because it”s illegal in the fashion world not to like Ann, but she needs to work on her walk. (Kayla and Jane are dubbed “fresh,” though Jane also needs to work on her walk.)

Chelsey manages to find another of the four go-see destination: a casting agency. The guy practically leers at Chelsey, which, in fashion, I guess, is very promising. Still, most of the girls are lucky to wedge in even one go-see during the whole challenge.

Chelsey, Chris and Jane make it back in time; Ann and Kayla don”t. Kelsey gets a Versace jacket. Kayla seems surprised that it isn”t a knockoff.

Time for the elimination challenge. The girls go to a villa on Lake Como, where Nigel Barker will photograph the girls as marble statues coming to life at the hands of a male model posing as a sculptor. That”s fine. Really. But someone PLEASE tell me whether this is Clooney”s mansion already.

Jane — poor, stiff, empty Jane — can”t even pose as a piece of stone.

“Hey Jane, you”re in a relationship, right?” Mr. Jay asks.

“No,” she answers.

“It shows,” he says.

Chelsey is up next. She instantly impresses everybody. And so does Ann.

That”s right! Ann has a passion for art, she says. And that”s nice, honey, but here”s what”s imporant: Ann is getting her comeback on! Kayla also brings her A-game, despite the hardship she”s suffered in her past.

Chris connects with the male model well at first, but she fades eventually, blaming a foot that she sprained during her go-sees.

So clearly, we”re looking at either Jane or Chris going home.

Panel time! Kyle Hagler of IMG is there as a guest judge. Andre Leon Talley has is black disco graduation robe on.

Kayla wins mad praise for her photo, but she”s scolded for not making more go-sees. Chelsey”s neck got lost in all her marble-colored paint. Chris delivers a meh shot.

Ann is the only one who would have been booked for Versace couture, but she was, of course, disqualified because she was late. Ann”s photo looks great, but Nigel says she can”t emote. I don”t know; she looks pretty emotional to me through the paint.

Jane”s blank face makes her look like she”s asleep in her photo. She breaks down in panel, though, frustrated that the judges don”t see her invisible personality.

Still, the biggest insult of the evening is not given to Jane.

“She could be the next Wanda Sykes,” Andre snipes about Chris, “but not a high-fashion model.”


The callout: Kayla, Chelsey, Ann.

Chris gets called out for being suddenly “less invested” in the competition. But it”s Jane who gets to stay in the tiny-ass model apartment in Milan. Chris is sent away with a hug, the fact that she”s commercial, and that she should take acting lessons stat.

Did the right model get sent home?

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