Well, after tonight we’ll have just seven designers — but I have to admit, I’m still seeing plenty of taste-challenged designers left in the game. I’m hoping that “PR” will cut back on the goofy challenges and really allow us to see what these guys are capable of doing. While yes, I readily admit there is something to be said for someone who’s creative enough to design a dress based on a boyfriend or husband’s description of what their significant other likes (as they did last week), the results seem to be more about luck than about true talent. But, judging from what I’ve seen of this week’s episode, we’ve got another oddball challenge before us that will do nothing more than exhaust the contestants and give the judges ample opportunity to come up with witty insults. But let’s get to it, shall we?
Heidi informs the final eight that they will be going to Rockwood Music Hall. Oh, and she hints that image is everything. Anthony Ryan thinks they’ll be inspired by old, retro rockers. Oh, if only it was so easy, Anthony Ryan. Instead, Tim tells them that fashion and music are linked, and Rolling Stone and Garnier have partnered to present an unsigned band on the cover of the magazine. That band is… The Sheepdogs. The designers must create outfits for the band — and they’ll be working in two teams of four. ANOTHER team challenge. Anya is annoyed, and honestly, so am I. Just let ’em do their own thing!
No one gets to pick teams this time, probably because it was starting to make Bert feel like the fat kid on the playground. Olivier, Viktor, Kimberly and Josh M. are one team, while the other is Bert, Laura, Anthony Ryan and Anya. Oh my, Bert, Laura and Anthony Ryan together again? This could be bad. Anya must be sweating bullets.
We meet the Sheepdogs. Who look like Sheepdogs. Sheepdogs that have never been groomed. They all look like extras from “Almost Famous,” but not that attractive. Ew, ew, ew. The band starts playing and Olivier wants to faint. It’s too loud! Worse than that, it’s not very good. Who was their competition? A homeless guy beating on a box?
The musicians talk about what they like. The drummer loves his daishiki. One guy wants red jeans. Let’s just ignore what these guys want. You know what would help? A shave and a shower. Possibly eating some vegetables. These guys look like they live in a van and eat pizza week in, week out.
The teams get together and start hammering away at ideas. Anya dubs her team Team Harmony, her big, broad hint that her teammates better behave themselves. Shockingly, Team Harmony really does seem pretty harmonious — for now.
Team Untitled is not as harmonious, because Josh M. is on the team. Olivier is upset because he got the”big” lead singer, and you KNOW how much Olivier hates anything big. Now might be the time to point out that the lead singer is not a candidate for stomach stapling, he’s just tall and sturdy looking. There’s nothing wrong with him. But Olivier is just BESIDE himself. How does he keep getting stuck with these people who don’t have the bodies of 12-year-old boys? Why, oh why is he being tortured so?
The designers run around Mood. Anya didn’t buy what she wanted. Olivier can’t find the right corduroy! Laura overspends and Bert underspends, so more love on Team Harmonious as he gives her his extra money. Aw, Bert, when did you become an old softie? Is someone slipping Metamucil into his morning oatmeal?
Viktor and Anya discuss the fact Oivier can’t work with real people. When your teammates notice you’ve got issues, you may want to accept that you have issues. Instead, Olivier just blames all the fat people of the world for ganging up on him. I would like to find two very large women to mash Olivier into a big hug until he screams for mercy. Which would probably take about two seconds.
Tim Gunn time! He comes in with the hairy, unattractive musicians. Laura is making red jeans and a tie-dye tank top for Leot. Leot makes some suggestions (he wants less of his super furry chest to show, and ugh, I’m fine with that) but otherwise, thumbs up. Sam also approves Anya’s design with a few tweaks. Ryan digs Anthony Ryan’s design as well. Then, it’s down to Ewan and Bert. Suddenly, Team Harmony hits a very unhappy chord. Ewan thinks it looks girly. He doesn’t like the fabric Bert has for the top. It’s a whole lot of purple for Ewan. Bert doesn’t have much fabric and he’s now in do-over mode. This may be curtains for Bert. Not that he has enough fabric for curtains, but still.
Viktor’s distressed denim doesn’t impress Tim, but we don’t hear what Leot has to say about it. Kimberly shows Sam her plaid fabric, but he prefers the other fabric she has on her table. And what fabric is that? The fabric that Anya loaned to her. Anya, what are you doing? Anyway, Sam prefers it so that’s what Kim’s going with. Anya is now kicking herself, because she just realized that she may have given away the fabric that would make her outfit win-worthy. Anya is so nice, but she needs to get her head into the game.
Josh M. is worried he’s going too gay for his straight model, Ryan. Tim thinks the zipper draws the eye to the crotch, which he considers a negative, but Ryan loves it. So, Josh M. isn’t too gay for a retro ’70s band of hippies. Yay. I still want Josh M. to go home as soon as humanly possible. Olivier shows Ewan his button down shirt in a girly fabric. It’s not a hit. Then, for some reason Olivier tells Ewan he’s a big man and he doesn’t want to make him look so big. Oh, shut up, Olivier.
But Olivier STILL can’t get over how BIG Ewan is. He never thought of making clothes for plus-size people. He’s acting like he’s dressing Dom DeLuise. Tim actually has to explain to Olivier how men’s pants should fit. But he’s dressing this FAT guy! HOW can he make clothes that fit a FAT guy? I would like to hold Olivier down and force feed him meatball subs until he BECOMES a fat guy at this point.
Kimberly is struggling, as she’s not a menswear designer. But at least she isn’t bitching about her model being fat.
Viktor is making a jacket with fringe, so what does Josh M. do? A vest with fringe. Viktor isn’t thrilled that Josh M. is copying him. Someone rat him out and get him sent home! Please!
Not surprisingly, not a lot to do in make-up this week.
Runway time! We have Nina Garcia, Michael Kors and “American Idol” alum Adam Lambert.
Instead of walking the runway, our hairy musicians PLAY MUSIC. Yes, it’s easy for me to tell if pants fit well when there’s a guitar in front of them. What, did we think these guys were incapable of walking? Was it part of the deal with Rolling Stone that we have to listen to as much of their retread 70s music as possible?
Oh, then we see still shots of the guys. I guess they really were incapable of walking in a straight line. I guess that seemed too girly for them. I am so very unimpressed with The Sheepdogs.
TEAM HARMONY
Anthony Ryan
The pants are saggy in the butt, and the shirt’s only okay until the guy turns around — the fringe is simply ridiculous.
Anya
Anya hates her outfit. And I agree, it’s not great. The little headband is the worst. He looks like an Indian scout.
Laura
This actually isn’t bad at all. I like the purple and the red, plus the texture of the jacket adds interest. It feels like she put a modern twist on the ’70s.
Bert
What the hell did he do with this guy’s hair? Braids? Ugh. Anyway, the outfit itself is okay. I dig the pants, but the shirt is too long and saggy.
TEAM UNTITLED
Josh M.
This looks like a hippie threw up on the guy. Too, too much. The pants are tacky, I hate the tank and it’s all overkill with the vest/jacket/whatever it is. I think some of these elements might be okay on their own, but it’s Halloween with everything all together.
Kimberly
Would you like fries with that?
Viktor
I actually do like this jacket a lot, and though the jeans are just too cliche, the shirt isn’t bad.
Olivier
This isn’t as bad as I thought it would be. But that doesn’t mean much. It doesn’t fit well and the pockets look glued on.
First up, Team Harmony. Michael doesn’t see the swagger. Nina thinks everything was very expected. But Heidi loves Laura’s outfit. Adam agrees. He feels it’s 70s and yet contemporary. Michael thinks the tie-dye looks a little Sweeney Todd, and he wishes it was more memorable. Nina thinks it looks like a woman’s jacket. Well, she has a point there.
Next up is Bert. Adam likes the tunic. Blech. Michael is amazed that Bert has a rocker vibe. Heidi likes the fabric. Nina loves the pigtails. Aack! She thinks Bert gave him an identity and a look. Huh, go figure. I do think Bert’s outfit was okay, but I’m surprised the judges are loving it so much.
Nina thinks Anya’s outfit looks like Pocahantas. Heidi gets the musician to turn around and we see that he already has a gaping hole in his pants. Ouch. Michael notes that this is the first week we’ve seen that Anya has only been sewing for four months. Michael keeps going, calling the guy Reggae Jesus and says he feels like the guy is wearing a “Brady Bunch” daishiki.
Heidi thinks Anthony Ryan’s look is only okay. Michael thinks he looks like one of the Golden Girls. Nina thinks the top is too feminine.
Ewan throws Olivier under the bus by pointing out he doesn’t like light pants. Heidi thinks it’s boring. Adam thinks it’s unflattering. Nina thinks it’s too feminine. Michael says it doesn’t fit right. Olivier is in trouble, simply because he should have nailed this challenge, at least on fit and tailoring alone.
Michael thinks Kimberly’s outfit looks like Peter Brady at an autumn harvest. Nina thinks he looks like he’s wearing an old man’s pajamas. Adam sees Scooby-Doo, and Heidi sees forest elf. Kimberly gets points for giving the judges such a great opportunity to hurl colorful insults.
Heidi loves Viktor’s jacket. She thinks it looks really expensive. Adam isn’t nuts about the shirt, but loves the jacket. Michael thinks it’s Mad Max meets Woodstock, plus he’s impressed that he’s wearing real jeans.
Onto Josh M.’s horrible outfit. Heidi likes the pants and the crotch zipper and loves the top and the vest. There’s a lot she likes, but there’s too much going on. Adam doesn’t like the detailing on the side of the pants or the butt pockets. Michael likes that it’s not a traditional fringed vest and calls it Neil Young meets Jim Morrison. Nina likes it. Crackheads! It’s Josh M.! He has no taste! Stop it!
The judges powwow. Adam hates Anya’s outfit the most, but Michael comes to her defense and points out that Olivier should have done a good job and didn’t. I think Olivier is getting the boot.
The designers are called onto the runway to meet their fates. Bert is in. Heidi tells him the judges really loved his outfit. Viktor is the winner. It was all about the jacket. Laura is in, Josh. M. is in. Anthony Ryan is in. Anya is in.
On the block are Kimberly and Olivier. Kimberly is… in. Olivier is going home. And I have to say, good riddance. He was an early favorite of mine, but his unwillingness to work with, oh, real people is just unreasonable.
He just moved to New York, so he hopes to find his passion again in high fashion. I hope the only job he can get is designing for Lane Bryant.
Do you think it was Olivier’s time to go? Did you like this challenge? What did you think of the lead singer’s braids?