Recap: ‘Project Runway’ – ‘The Hi’s and Lows of Fashion’

01.29.10 8 years ago


Well, it”s the very first team episode, so I”m guessing there”s going to be hair pulling and seam ripping, because this crew is shaping up to be one dislikable bunch of wannabes. Even before we discover what the challenge for the day will be, it seems like everyone lines up to take a pot shot at Ping. Granted, she”s an easy target, what with a name like Ping and her buttless dress, but it seems a little early in the season for people to be this snide. Not that she was the only target. Jesse, who I hadn”t even realized was on the show up this point (yeah, memorable the guy is not) had to ask Jesus if his strategy for winning was to be in the bottom two week after week. Seriously, why not just smother him with a pillow, Jesse? Who put eau du jerkass in the communal body wash?

[Full recap of Thursday (Jan. 28) night’s “Project Runway” after the break…]

Anyway, let”s get on with the show. Heidi orders everyone to goose step to the Met, which is super exciting to Mila because she”s a pretentious 15-year-old trapped in a body that looks about 50 and she doesn”t realize how stupid it sounds to say you”re super excited about the Met without a trace of irony in your voice.

Tim Gunn points out a bunch of fabulous couture dresses, then tells everyone they have to pair up (boo) but they get $500 (yay) and have two days to make a fabulous couture outfit.

Jay picks Maya, Jesus picks Amy, Anthony picks Seth, Janeane picks Ben, Mila picks Jonathan, Ping picks Jesse and Emilio picks the last chick, Anna Marie. Jesse is deeply bummed out to be picked by Ping, to which I say, karma”s a bitch, baby.

So far, so good with the pairings. Oh, wait, spoke too soon, because at Mood Jesse is yelling at Ping because she has no idea how to measure fabric. And then he starts yelling at her back in the work room. Ping is getting stressed out. This could end badly. As in, naked woman going down the runway badly.

Eventually, though, we move away from the Ping/Jesse car wreck, and I have to say, I love Anthony. We all need an Anthony in our lives. I”m thinking that, once the show is over, I”ll ask him if he wants to live in my spare bedroom, because really, he”s that much fun. After pointing out that he and Seth are working with red, yellow and black, he adds that they”re designing a dress for the vice president of McDonald”s, which is just plain funny. Because it”s kinda true. Which is also sad. But I have faith in him and Seth. Make it work, fellas!

Just as everyone”s settling into a groove, Tim walks into the workroom to announce a second look must be made. For fifty bucks. Influenced by the work of another team. Out of pipe cleaners. I made up the last part, but hey, I wouldn”t have been surprised.

More melting down in the workroom. Seth and Anthony are sniping at each other. Jonathan is realizing all Mila wants to do is swan around in front of the mirror and daydream. Maya is pissed that Jay isn”t making much of an effort because he has immunity.

Alas, no catfighting, as much as I was rooting for a little bloodletting. But it”s runway time! Whoo!

Judges are Michael Kors, Nina Garcia and acclaimed British designer Matthew Williamson. I”m just thrilled it”s not a C-list startlet.

Anthony and Seth
I don”t love this. It looks a little raggedy around the waistline. Weird feathery crap all over the bodice. Glad to see they dropped the red sash, but they needed to keep editing.

Jesus and Amy
I do like this, however. Love the shoulder ruffle and the patchwork look.

Mila and Jonathan
I love the jacket, but the pants look a little yoga class.

Janeane and Ben

This is cute, but it”s not couture.

Emilio and Anna Marie
This is okay, but not great. Very blah color, and the cut of the dress looks a little old fashioned and matronly.

Jay and Maya
I”m not sure about the ruffle. I love the idea, but the execution – is it supposed to flop over onto her face like that?

Ping and Jesse

The color combinations are great, but why the hell is she lugging the bottom half of her dress around like a shawl?

And on to the cheap stuff…

Jesus and Amy
This is actually a very cute, very modern casual look. Good job.

Anthony and Seth
This isn”t a showstopper. A little dowdy, have to say.

Mila and Jonathan
This looks cheap, though I like the high waist.

Janeane and Ben
Nice job of ripping off Mila”s jacket, but I think these guys went a little too literal in their interpretation.

Emilio and Anna Marie
Cute outfit, but I didn”t see the connection with the original outfit.

Jay and Maya

The vest looks like someone cut the fabric with their teeth.

Ping and Jesse
This is okay, but it”s blah.

The lowest scores are Seth Aaron and Anthony and Ping and Jesse. They”re asked to leave the runway, probably so they don”t cry.

But forget about the losers. Time to shower love on the cream of the crop.

Matthew loves Jay and Maya”s look because it”s so modern and dramatic. Nina loves the thin strap in the back. Michael thinks their cheap look blows the $500 inspiration out of the water. Really?

Heidi loves Mila and Jonathan”s signature look. Michael thinks the coat looks effortless. Nina loves it. Michael thinks their cheap look kinda sucked, but hey, look at the inspiration.

Nina thinks Ping and Jesse”s look looks like a bunch of fabric. Michael thinks the model looks like the Statue of Liberty. Michael thinks the cheap look is an ill-fitting blah dress. Then, Jesse and the model throw Ping under the bus by saying she didn”t measure the model and didn”t know how to sew. Evil much?

Michael thinks Seth and Anthony”s dress looks like “Gone with the Wind.” Michael thinks the cheap look looks cheap. Nina thinks both dresses are really ugly. She”s disappointed in Seth, but my man Seth stands up for his pal Anthony and takes 50 percent of the responsibility.

Then, the behind the scenes judge chat, which is pretty much the same as the in front of the scenes judge chat. Big thumbs up for Maya and Jay and Mila and Jonathan. Matthew called Ping”s dress a cacophony of ideas. Heidi thought the couture dress didn”t even fit. Heidi thinks Seth and Aaron went costume-y. I think Ping”s going home.

Jonathan is… in. Mila is… the winner. Couldn”t happen to a bitchier designer. Especially loved that she sat on her ass and let Jonathan do all the work. Maya and Jay are in.

Seth is… in. Jesse is… in. Anthony is…in. Ping is out. Ping cries. Ping thinks she did an amazing job. Oh, Ping, Ping, Ping.

Can”t say I”m sorry to see Ping go, although I think the rest of the designers will miss their punching bag.

Do you think Jesse threw Ping under the bus? Did Mila deserve to win? Do you think this group of designers is the cattiest yet?

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