SHELF LIFE: ‘The Final Terror’ is as forgettable as slasher fare gets

What is Shelf Life? I recently moved into a new apartment, which means I had to box my entire movie collection. Now I”m trying to figure out how much of my physical media actually fits here.

Each and every title is now up for grabs, new or old, and it”s time to decide what goes on the shelf and what just plain goes.

TITLE: The Final Terror
YEAR: 1983
DIRECTOR: Andrew Davis
SCREENWRITER: Jon George & Neill D. Hicks and Ronald Shusett
FORMAT: Blu-ray/DVD combo pack
PURCHASED OR SENT: Sent.

WHAT IS IT? Deliverance The 13th. Filled with actors you vaguely recognize when they were young (including Daryl Hannah, Joe Pantoliano, Rachel Ward, and Adrian Zmed), this is a fairly dull slasher entry that leans heavily on what must have already been cliches when they did them, but which are almost unbearable to sit through at this point.

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Scream Factory is one of the best things happening in home video right now, a specialty label by Shout! Factory that focuses on horror films, and unsurprisingly, the Scream Factory release for The Final Terror is very well-done. Offering both a DVD and a Blu-ray, the actual transfer is astonishing considering they had to build it from various film prints acquired from collectors. There is no negative for this film now, no inter-positive to use to help master a new home video release, and so the company reached out to collectors. They did fantastic work, and if the movie was even a little bit good, it would be an impressive feat in film restoration. It feels like a huge effort to very little return here, though, and I was disappointed. When I put the film on, I knew I”d seen it before, but I couldn”t remember it. I figured this would be the viewing where I learned why this one is worth remembering. Unfortunately, I figure six months from now, I will have completely forgotten it again.

DOES IT DESERVE A PLACE ON THE SHELF? Nope. It”s a beautifully made and packaged disc for a complete zero of a film.
The Final Terror is available on Blu-Ray/DVD from Scream Factory now.

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