In watching TLC”s “Hoarding: Buried Alive” (new episodes return July 10, 9 p.m. EST) and A&E”s “Hoarders,” I was tempted to break down the subtle differences between the two to create an easy viewing guide for you, dear reader, so that you might be able to determine which show is a better use of your valuable lounging-around-and-eating-chips-on-the-sofa time. But that was before I kept pausing my television to scream, “OH MY GOD, is that flat, furry thing the cleaner picked up a cat carcass? And why oh why is that woman trying to KEEP it? Are those rats? Is that wall of gooey looking stuff actually POOP? I feel sick. I think I have to go clean something. Throw up first, then clean something.”
Welcome to the joys of hoarding TV.