Hey, how come Detroit doesn’t host more Super Bowls? Is it the vagabonds frozen in ice in the elevator shafts of abandoned warehouses? Be honest. It’s the dead frozen vagabonds, isn’t it? [The Detroit News]
“It turns out that this explorer last week was playing hockey with a group of other explorers on the frozen waters that had collected in the basement of the building. None of the men called the police, the explorer said. They, in fact, continued their hockey game.”
That caller was actually Henrik Zetterberg… the body was Chris Chelios.
whoops I mean GO STEELERS AND/OR CARDINALS
It turns out that [the discoverer of the body] last week was playing hockey with a group of other explorers on the frozen waters that had collected in the basement of the building. None of the men called the police, the explorer said. They, in fact, continued their hockey game.
/elevator shaft of abandoned warehouse flies open
I find the term “vagabond” offensive, I prefer the term “hobo”
“I don’t recognize him from his shoes.”
/writes name and next of kin on shoes.
@fmra: Don Cherry thinks your post is soft, like all european hockey players.
Coming soon to a town near you if you keep bowing down to the UAW
No thanks. I prefer my hobo-on-the-rocks with a twist of lemon.
@Ryno: Yes, the UAW is what causes all misery. At least, the misery that’s not already caused by fags and colored people.
Leave him for science, let explores in the year 3000 learn about our society from this guy
That’s just awful. That is all.
@Ryno: seriously right? why wont those pesky unions stop harassing those poor bedraggled multi-national corporations. dental care today, communism tomorrow!!! yeah, I’m off to puke.
“I don’t recognize him from his shoes.”
I’m surprised they found him with his shoes still on!
Also, this does absolutely zero to quell my lifelong morbid fascination with visiting Detroit. What can I say? Somebody rubbed a magnet against my moral compass when I was young.
A man in his 60s was just found frozen to death in his truck outside his home in Detroit. He’d been apparently living in his truck cause he had no heat in his house. His dogs were found nearby dead of starvation. Ok, sorry. Seriously why am I reading the news anymore?
And that’s why they call it Hockey town
Atleast nobody stole his wallet.
@CR: And that’s not all your frozen Michigander news for today. A hobo froze to death in Grand Rapids because he was a sex offender and homeless shelters wouldn’t let him in.
Megadittos, moron. Megadittos.
@StuScott: In my head, I read that in a newscaster voice. Same frozen hobos, twice the hilarity.
@SSB, thanks for piece of good news. All sex offenders should freeze to death.
Also, good to see others agreeing with me on the term “hobo”
More freezing to death fun from the state of Michigan
Jesus Hell Fucking Shitstorm Christ. Do those morons in that state up north not have heat? Burn things in empty barrels you neanderthal fucktards.
That was actually future 2Port from a timeline where the Steelers loose Sunday night
— hopefully not our timeline
Robert Van Winkle will be leading the political push on these issues.
(door flies open)
Alright stop, collaborate and listen!
you know, thats enough…stop making the beautiful wonderful gorg…BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA ok I keed…this place sucks…how we ever got 1 superbowl let alone 2 is beyond me :/
Am I correct in saying that pretty much the only reason Detroit got the superbowl is because the NFL has a policy that promises to award the game to a town that invests in a new stadium?
It’s the same reason that KC is getting one coming soon correct?
@Ryno: And the same reason Dallas is getting the one in 2010 (or is it 2011?). So, yeah. You may be right.
Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis gets the SB in 2012, so you might be onto something Ryno
Katni, Dallas hosts in 2011
“”You got a couple bucks?” he asked.”
@Upstate Underdog: really? he deserved to die? you don’t even know what he did, he could’ve been 16 yrs old having sex with another 16 yr old consensually. 20 years ago. sheesh.
I keep my hoboes in one place, and one place alone: A dead hooker pit. I figure the hoboes and hookers are pretty much cut from the same (dead) cloth anyway, right? And they fit right in together…stack ’em ten high, and I’m ready to go.
It gets kind of tough when the pits get full…but that’s why God gave us backhoes, right?
@CR, from the article, “he was convicted in Grand Traverse County in 1991 of second-degree criminal sexual conduct against a person younger than 13.”
So to answer your question, yes really, he deserved to die.
/door to elevator shaft flies open
YA BETTA ASK SOMEBOD………ah shit too late.
That was one hell of a hip check.
@Upstate Underdog: well ok he probably was a horrible person but I still don’t think he deserved to die. so, death penalty for all second degree criminal sexual conduct convictions? I still have to ask, really? Nancy Grace?
I mean the Ford family could open up that stadium as a homeless shelter for the 19,000 homeless people in the city. It’s not like they actually use it for football or anything. Also, with all the hobos in there, it would more than double the attendance for the home games.
/make it so #1
I concur UU!
@CR, your opinion might change when you have kids of your own. Until then let’s agree to disagree on this one.
As another father, I’m with UU. I’d do the deed personally and then go all Sam-Jackson-in-A Time to Kill at my trial.
@UU: I hear ya. I just work in the justice system and trust me they’re not all monsters like on L&O:SVU and it’s not always cut and dry. But just ignore my crabbiness. It’s the cold. I’m not trying to fight on a sports humor website that’s ridiculous.
Another would-be Buck Rogers fails to make it to the 25th Century.
If he had burned a UAW worker he might still be alive today.
I’ve been in jail longer than Nelson Mandela, so maybe you want me to run for president?
If God has any sense of justice, those feet belong to Charles Rogers.
BFD if a child molester died, but the WWII vet article from MSP1 is straight up disturbing and sad. The man won a purple heart in the South Pacific and some asshat from the power company installed a device on his house that caused him to DIE! He was a bona fide American hero, more of a man than I could ever hope to be. Michigan can suck a half nut and so can the power company.
You’re a fucking idiot.
It’s so cooold in tha D…
Damn, that last apple was way down at the bottom.
@ CR – thanks for speaking up. you said it before i could
/also works in “justice” related profession
Charles Rogers or Mike Willaims…both of those franchise killers need to be wearing cement shoes