Hey guys, good to see you again, did you have a good summer? Oh, you went to the beach? Dang, that sounds like fun, I bet the weather was great! Oh, well that’s too bad, but I bet you had fun playing board games in the condo. What do you mean you don’t play board games, what did you do all night? Oh, those clubs never let me in, I figured they were member’s only. Well that’s cool, I guess.
What did I do this off-season? Oh nothing much, unless you count… GROWING THIS TOTALLY KICKASS BEARD!!!
HELLS YEAH, IT’S GROWIN’ IN THICK AND EVERYTHING. DAD SAYS IF HE’S NOT TOO BUSY HE MIGHT TAKE ME TO BUY BUY A REMINGTON BEARD TRIMMER AFTER PRACTICE. THAT THING’S GOT LIKE, A BAZILLION ATTACHMENTS!
WHY DID I GROW IT? BECAUSE I NEEDED A NEW LOOK FOR THIS SEASON. WE WON IT ALL LAST YEAR, AND NOTHING SAYS “I’M A BIG MAN NOW” LIKE SOME FACE PUBES!
HEY, YOU NEED SOME CONDOMS ROOKIE? ‘CAUSE I GOT ABOUT A THOUSAND OF ‘EM IN MY LOCKER. HURRY UP BEFORE I USE EM ALL…