Ah St. Patrick’s Day, the one day a year when you’re supposed to get hammered before convincing gullible news crews in the deep south that you’ve located a mythical leprechaun hiding in a tree. I may not fully understand your gentile holidays, but I certainly enjoy them. While we here at KSK have no official plans for this festival of drunkenness it’s a safe bet that we’ll all be drinking Jamesons and/or Guinness at some point this
evening afternoon morning…
//hits head on keyboard
[1 hour later]
Anyway, while you’re getting ready for the fun take a look at how your favorite NFL personalities will be carrying on today.
Tommy from Quincy- Wearing his new SACK MY CAWK, I’M A WICKED FAHKIN’ MIC! t-shirt.
Kerry Collins- “I’m not going to drink. I’m not going to drink. I’m not going to drink. Ah fuck it, give me one of them shiftless black beers.”
Ben Roethlisberger- PEW PEW PUKE
Jerry Jones- Goes fuckin’ crazier than usual!
Ryan Fitzpatrick- Reads Ulysses.
Kate Mara- Packs heat.
Matt Leinart- Breaks out the limited edition green beer bong to impress two ginger girls he met while they were ditching sixth period.
Eli Manning- Takes a special bath with Moishe and a bar of Irish Spring soap.
Tom Brady- Dresses Giselle’s dogs in matching kelly green Dolce & Gabbana numbers.
John Carney- Walks around enveloped in the distinct stench of cabbage.
Todd Haley- “What, you think I celebrate that fucking Paddy holiday? I’M FROM ENGLISH STOCK, YOU KNOW-NOTHING ASSHOLE!”
J.T. O’Sullivan- Rids the Colonies of the Protestant Scourge.
Tom Coughlin- Gets all red in the face from screaming at a barmaid.
Deuce McAllister- Wonders why everybody thinks he’s Irish.