Earlier today, HBO announced that the Miami Dolphins would follow in the footsteps of their AFC rivals, the New York Jets, and be featured in this season’s edition of “Hard Knocks.” This is funny because I said “foot” and “New York Jets” in the same sentence and Rex Ryan coaches the Jets and Rex Ryan likes feet and you are very welcome for the explanation. In a statement, HBO explained their decision to follow the Dolphins:
We are delighted that HARD KNOCKS will be returning this summer and placing the spotlight on the Miami Dolphins, a venerable franchise that had an exciting off-season activity,â€ says Ken Hershman, president, HBO Sports. â€œThis marks the first time that the series has featured a first-year head coach (Joe Philbin) and we are extremely grateful to both Coach Philbin and the entire organization for agreeing to participate. As always, there will be plenty on the line for veterans, free agents and rookies.
And in case any of you were wondering if bringing in a camera crew and production staff was just a ploy by a fame-hungry organization to grab the spotlight (“MEET OUR NEWEST MINORITY OWNERS, KE$HA AND THE GIRL FROM THAT ‘CALL ME MAYBE’ SONG!”), that is absolutely not the case. Nope, not even a little bit.
“No. 1, it was a football decision,â€ Philbin said. â€œIt was made by the football operations staff. Our owner [Stephen Ross] supported this decision, but in no way shape or form forced us to make the decision. [Miami Herald]
Yes, because nothing says “football decision” like making a rookie coach fight for the attention of his players during training camp with lights and cameras that are following their every move. I am sure that will end well and not with Reggie Bush making kissy faces at the camera and flexing for it a bunch and seeing if it wants to go out for dinner some night at Joe’s Stone Crab. Maybe a nightcap afterward. Who knows? The night is young and so are they, after all. Then back at home Reggie Bush will dim the lights, put on a Prince album, and lean in for a kiss. Cut to the next morning, when the camera wakes up in Reggie’s bed feeling ashamed. Things will get awkward at camp after that. Trust me, I’ve seen it a million times.
Wait a second, where was I? Oh yeah. In conclusion, here is a picture of Dolphins rookie quarterback Ryan Tannehill’s wife Lauren shooting a gun. America is going to love her.